Monday, August 12, 2019

Paperback 1055: In Comes Death / Paul Whelton (Graphic 49)

Paperback 1055: Graphic 49 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: In Comes Death
Author: Paul Whelton
Cover artist: Uncredited

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $15

Best things about this cover:
  • Death looks kinda down-at-the-heels. Reduced to doing cheap hits. Must need the money.
  • I'm obsessed with whatever she's wearing. Is that a ... housecoat? It looks too dressy for a nightgown, but too slovenly for outdoor wear. Lack of undergarments also suggests an indoors-only context, but ... yeah, what is this?
  • She is very pretty and beautifully painted and I hate when there are no artist credits!
  • Love the way she's wound the cord around her right hand. Nice touch. Fear hand (variation)!
  • This scene looks very (Very) familiar ... 
... which is weird, since the movie came out two years *after* this book
and now the back cover:

Best things about this back cover:
  • There is nothing intriguing, compelling, or even interesting about this description. Ooh, a "mysterious death." Aah, a "deadly game of wits." How ... specific and not-at-all boiler-plate.
  • I want it to be Lonely Frog Lane, named after an actual lonely frog who lived there all alone, froggily
  • This "describe the plot in complete but annoying vague sentences" really is bottom-of-the-barrel cover copy.
Page 123~
"Peace!" I intoned, making an exit.
Very slangy! Just like the kids intone it.


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Monday, August 5, 2019

Paperback 1054: The Raft / Robert Trumbull (Dell 26)

Paperback 1054: Dell 26 (1st ptg, 1944)

Title: The Raft
Author: Robert Trumbull
Cover artist: George Frederiksen
Back cover artist: Gerald Gregg

Condition: 6.5/10
Estimated value: $10

Best things about this cover:
  • Everything above the author's name seems very pleasant. Serene, even. Perhaps, as your eyes move down the page, you can even maintain the illusion that these fellows are just out for a weekend jaunt of fun & sun. But that "DELL WAR BOOK" (a kind of book I can't remember seeing before) drives the more dire context home pretty thoroughly.
  • I like early Dell covers, and early covers in general, which are far more tied to abstract expressionism than later, more naturalistic covers (which I also love, obviously)
  • I also like the early Dell EYEBALL IN THE KEYHOLE logo. "You don't read Dell Books, Dell Books read you!"
Best things about this back cover:
  • What is happening here? Why are they spaced so far apart? Why have their arms fused together? Does the dude in the middle need propping up? Is this some kind of Weekend at Bernie's situation?
  • The italicizing concept here is ill-conceived. I know alliteration has its charms, but choose parallel construction every time. 
  • War bond ads appeared inside early paperbacks with a great deal of regularity. On the outside of early paperbacks?? Far less so.
Page 123~
He seemed more interested in the boat than in his natural prey.


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Wednesday, July 24, 2019

Paperback 1053: La Dolce Vita / Federico Fellini (Ballantine S 517 K)

Paperback 1053: Ballantine S 517 K (PBO, 1961)

Title: La Dolce Vita
Author: Federico Fellini (trans. Oscar DeLiso and Bernard Shir-Cliff)
Cover artist: photo cover (Anita Ekberg!)

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $12-15

Best things about this cover:
  • Best things? I'm going to be polite and say "her armpits! they're breathtaking!"
  • I think the stylized color title font against the black-and-white still works very nicely
  • Like many paperbacks of the era, this book seems to be promising more hot action than it is going to be able to deliver. "Over 96 pages of photos!" (most of them not showcasing the ample figure of Ms. Ekberg)
Best things about this back cover:
  • Only Fellini may wear that hat
  • Really laying the sex on thick here. I guess '60s audiences were really titillated by "decadence"
  • Holy shit I was so distracted by the hat that I almost missed the KITTEN
Page 123~


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Friday, July 19, 2019

Paperback 1052: Gold Comes in Bricks / A.A. Fair (Erle Stanley Gardner) (Dell 84)

Paperback 1052: Dell 84 (1st ptg, 1945)

Title: Gold Comes in Bricks
Author: A.A. Fair (pseud. of Erle Stanley Gardner)
Cover artist: Gerald Gregg

Condition: 5/10
Estimated value: $15

Best things about this cover:
  • Gold comes in testicles
  • It looks like honey, and if you gotta go, I say asphyxiated by honey is the way!
  • Really love the early Dell covers, which had no pretensions to realism. Much more interested in evoking feeling with shape and color than in getting the perspective or anatomy right
  • Check out the jaunty cursive on the author's name. The early pb was the wild west, from a design perspective. Everyone still experimenting, going nuts.
  • This is the Platonic ideal of the "Reading Copy." Beat to hell, but still tight and complete and unfragile. They don't make 'em like they used to!

Best things about this back cover:
  • Mapback!
  • Uh ... this could be more interesting. Two nondescript hotel rooms! Thrill to the architectural possibilities!
  • LOL "Corridor," thanks, map
Page 123~
The machine shops had moved. The office stood deserted. There was an air of funereal despair about the town. Those who were left went dejectedly about their business, moving with the listless lassitude of persons who have lost their chance at winning big stakes and are plugging away simply because they can't figure out how to quit.
Ouch. I feel seen. And accused.


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Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Paperback 1051: The Big Sqeeze / Christopher Athens (Chicago House A102)

Paperback 1051: Chicago House A102 (PBO, 1962)

Title: The Big Squeeze
Author: Christopher Athens
Cover artist: Uncredited (!!!?)

Condition: 9/10
Value: $15-20

Best things about this cover:

  • Billy woulda taken first place at the 9th grade art show for sure but the judges said his rad painting, which is obviously a commentary on free speech, had "sexual content" and they totally disqualified him, like what is this, Soviet Russia? Bogus.
  • Seriously, though, what is happening?
  • The dude ... did the dude forget his ... shoe? Is that a shoe? A tipped over bag of groceries? A melted turntable? I know I should be focused on the naked ladies, but...
  • Are they going up or down? Also, why? Also, is Red dead? Also, why?
  • Protip: cover one of the most important visual elements of your cover with giant block letters so the reader has no idea wtf is going on. It's avant-garde!
  • This book is in perfect condition ... is the best thing I can say about this book.

Best things about this back cover:

  • OK, right off the bat, I can tell you the cover copy writer has limited experience with what we in the writing business call "verbs."
  • BRB, relabeling all my booze "Parts Cleaner"
  • "Three-and-a-half bells?" Are we at sea?
  • "This pair of chicks tried to pick me up once and ... what? You don't know them. They live in Canada. ANYway, these totally real chicks..."
  • Who the f is "Tom Anthony"?

Page 123~
"Brush my teeth," I said, holding a hand in front of my mouth.
"Oh," exhaled Barbara. "When you said 'oral' I thought ... well, nevermind what I thought ..."


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Monday, July 1, 2019

Paperback 1050: Bogus Lover / Hy Silver (Newsstand Library U136)

Paperback 1050: Newsstand Library U136 (PBO, 1960)

Title: Bogus Lover
Author: Hy (ho?) Silver
Cover artist: Robert Bonfils

Condition: 8/10
Estimated value: $15

Best things about this cover:
  • I love her girl-about-town, devil-may care look. I'm not sure who's throwing bras and mannequin heads at her, but she doesn't seem fazed.
  • That blue is exquisite.
  • They've certainly, uh, made sure to emphasize her torso profile. The extensive boob shadow is kinda overkill. It's like, yeah, we see. They're lovely.
  • The valentine on the mannequin's face is so freaky. What is even happening here!?
Best things about this back cover:
  • Argh, too much text!
  • I'm pretty sure that "crunched" is the wrong word for what casting couches do when you put your lustful weight on them, but admittedly this isn't really my bailiwick. Maybe someone got sloppy with corn chips?
  • "Hey boss, how many 'm's in Peggy's "'Mmmmmmmm?'" "That depends. Is she lustful?" "Oh, yes, sir. Very." "Then ... Eight!" "But, sir, that's ... that's two more than we've ever done. Are you su—" "I'M TRYIN' TO SELL BOOKS HERE, MAN, JUST DO IT!" (/scene)
  • Wait. Peggy? Then who's Wanda? We lost gentle Wanda somewhere between paragraphs two and three. Oh, the boss is not gonna be happy about this...
Page 123~
"I guess we're both stupid," he said as he started the engine.
Real talk.


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Friday, June 28, 2019

Paperbacks 1047, 1048, and 1049: A Doc Savage trio (Bantam, 1969 (2) and 1976 (1))

Paperbacks 1047-49: Doc Savage 35, 38, and 83 (1969, 1969, 1976)

Titles: The Squeaking Goblin, Red Snow, The Red Terrors
Author: Kenneth Robeson (Lester Dent, Lester Dent, Harold A. Davis)
Cover artists: James Bama, James Bama, Boris Vallejo

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $20 for the lot

[Gift to the collection from a Western NY Reader]

Best things about this cover:
  • "It ain't me what's squeakin', it's me musket!" squeaked Goblin Davy Crockett

Best thing about this cover:
  • It's like if Hawkman and Hulk had a pin-headed monster baby

Best thing about this cover:
  • Doc Savage tried to start his life over as a crossing guard at Mystical Orb High School for Avian Cosplay, but it didn't take
Page 123~
One of the hired men pointed. "Red was a-meanderin' over thot way, last I seed a' him."
These books are all of astonishingly uniform length (~130pp.) and not at all badly written (at least on a basic grammatical level). They were originally published in the Doc Savage pulp magazine (in the '30s) and then were reprinted by Bantam roughly 30-40 years later, which puts them just before and toward the tail end of / just after the main time frame of my paperback collection (1939-69). Lester Dent (how wrote a ton of the "Kenneth Robeson" Doc Savage stories) was an accomplished crime fiction writer from the heydey of hardboild crime fiction. I covered one of his books back at Paperback 741.

Anyway, thanks to the lovely human who sent me these books in the mail today—individually wrapped! So thoughtful.


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Tuesday, June 25, 2019

Paperback 1046: The Sit-In / George B. Anderson (Ace 76835)

Paperback 1046: Ace 76835 (PBO, 1970)

Title: The Sit-In
Author: George B. Anderson
Cover artist: George Gross

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $20-25 (counterculture, baby!)

[from giant box of books I got in the mail from "Special Sauce" ... I'll be rolling these out as fast as I reasonably can]

Best things about this cover:
  • Answering the question: What if Dirty Harry had been a T.A. for Marxist Cultural Theory?
  • Two words. One, mustard. Two, cardigan. KILLER outfit!
  • A narc wrote this
  • This was published just after Kent State. So you'd know who the real bad guys were. Cut your hair, Comrade Cardigan!
Best things about this back cover:
  • LOL grad student. Called it!
  • "Don't trust anyone over 30 ... or, you know Happiness in general, man"
  • Wow, this is a right-wing fever dream. "He's coming for you and your suburban children, aged 2 and 4, named John and Jennifer, probably!"
Page 123~
He remembered going duck-hunting, as a kid, in the late fall, but he wouldn't even handle a shotgun since his return from Viet.
Was that a common way to refer to Vietnam? Just shortened like that? First I've seen that. Also, predictably, the family-man is the *real* man, the real hero, because he'd actually *been* to war, as opposed to Murdery McBeardo, who is a nerd.


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Friday, June 21, 2019

Paperback 1045: Abnormal Lover / Clark Connor (Merit Book 507)

Paperback 1045: Merit Book 507 (2nd ptg, 1961)

Title: Abnormal Lover
Author: Clark Connor
Cover artist: "Sloane" (uncredited)

Condition: 8/10
Estimated value: $20-25

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Merit Books 507
Best things about this cover:
  • Jesus H, what kind of corset injury did she suffer as a young woman!?
  • I love how she's like, "Yeah, they're stretch marks, so what!? I don't see you looking away!"
  • I'm all for that vest-only look, but the pants seem a little ... bunchy.
  • O god, her hand! Was that part of the corset accident!? I'm just glad she overcame adversity and went on to live her truth.
  • "Bru-" is killing me. KILLING ME. How are you this bad at layout!?
  • I assume her left pinky is the "point of perversion" in question.

Best things about this back cover:
  • Better in black and white
  • And the winner for Worst Compound Adjective in a Back Cover Blurb goes to ...
  • I love how proud the artist ("Sloane!") was of this painting. "Y'all aren't cropping out my signature, dammit. I WILL LIVE THRU THE AGES!"
Page 123~
"I can't, Raymond. I don't have time to see Art Meric. I have to leave on a trip. A very important trip, Raymond!"
A long silence.
"What's wrong, Raymond? Raymond! Raymond!"
"I"m not going to be IGNORED, Raymond..."


🎶"Everywhere around the world / They come to see Art Meric-a"🎶


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Monday, June 17, 2019

Paperback 1044: Natures Gifts / Norma Hughes (After Hours 160)

Paperback 1044: After Hours AH160 (PBO, 1967)

Title: Natures Gifts
Author: Norma Hughes
Cover artist: [Bill Alexander again?]

Condition: 8/10
Estimated value: $25

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]
After Hours AH160
Best things about this cover:
  • When yoga class gets a little too "authentic"...
  • Sally and Jenny hovered uncomfortably between ab-hunger and diaper-revulsion
  • Wait, those aren't abs. They aren't in the right place ... what are those??!?!
  • "And that, ladies, is how you throw a slider"
  • OK, I'll just say what we're all thinking: where's the fucking apostrophe?
Best things about this back cover:

Back page designer: "I have this idea for a kind of harem motif, where a seraglio doorway provides..."

Publisher: "Sorry, Bill, we're going with a bathroom tile. Thanks for these storyboards, tho."

Page 123~
That evennig he mailed them out to Paris to his contact.
Needless to say, [sic]


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Friday, June 14, 2019

Paperback 1043: Torrid Tramps / George H. Smith (Novel Book 6029)

Paperback 1043: Novel Book 6029 (PBO, 1962)

Title: Torrid Tramps
Author: George H. Smith
Cover artist: photo cover ("posed by professional model"!)

Condition: 7/10 (great, but mild smashing mid-spine)
Estimated value: $20

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]
Novel Book 6029
Best things about this cover:
  • The words promise a lot, but these photos do Not deliver. They all look like people who went to a beach party and got food poisoning, esp. that sweaty 50-year-old at the bottom left. "No ... no sudden movements, sweetheart. Be a doll and bring me an icepack ..."
  • Honestly this should be called Tepid Tramps, nothing remotely torrid is going on here
  • Ah, I see they were all created by sadists. That makes sense—I feel pretty abused by this whole cover
  • Could not figure out what was going on with center guy's head and honestly though he had some kind of bear head on, like a team mascot, or some kind of half-clad Furry
  • George H. Smith: "Could you make my name ... like, small?" Editors: "OK, how's this?" Smith: "............... smaller"
Best things about this back cover: 
  • "BY POPULAR DEMAND!" LOL I doubt that
  • "Typewriter" I love this man. My kingdom for George H. Smith's typewriter!
  • That is one hell of a catalogue. I love the specificity of "ten days." How big was the print run? Like, 12 copies?
  • Oh man sweaty middle-aged dude is bigger here. Bigger is worse.
Page 123~ (I want to copy this whole page for you, it's so "good")
Then, they came together like rutting bitch and dog, like fumbling drake and duck ... like nipping stallion and nervous, screaming mare.
... like sullen Frog and anxious, sweating Toad

OK, I lied, that was the end of p. 122! Here's the opening of 123:
They made their love in the deep straw, taking their chances with the Diamond Back Rattlers...
"Hey, what're you guys doin' over there?" "Leave us alone! We'll make our love, you make yours! No copying"


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Tuesday, June 11, 2019

Paperback 1042: Bartered Mates / Thomas K. Makagon (Unique Books 144)

Paperback 1042: Unique Books 144 (PBO, 1967)

Title: Bartered Mates
Author: Thomas K. Makagon
Cover artist: that guy ... I always forget his name ... one of you will tell me (Bill Alexander)

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: a lot

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Unique Books 144
Best things about this cover:

  • I keep reading "Battered Meats"
  • Get it on! Bang a gong! Makagon!
  • The pointing lady is the best. We don't even get to see her face. Just her amazing get-up and pointing arm. "J'accuse!" "Koochy koochy koo!" "Where Are This Man's Damned Nipples!?"
  • I really dig The Couch Of Impossible Boobs
  • If you look at his left foot too long you will be cursed. I have warned you.
  • This book is bizarrely rare. I searched ["bartered mates" makagon] and got TWO HITS TOTAL

Best things about this back cover:

  • I've seen worse cover copy, but not much worse. I do like the manic use of "—" there in the first paragraph. "Is it a happening, a trend, or a switch ... ? ... fuck it, let's just go with all of the above!"
  • Why is there a comma after "delectable" in paragraph 2!?! Truly, I am bothered far more by punctuation minutiae than by the preposterous cheesiness of it all.
  • OK the first sentence of paragraph 2 is utterly ungrammatical (although LOL at "brain child" quote unquote)
  • Shouldn't it be "a between-pictures diversion" OK I'll stop now.
  • "... the private threats of enjoyed and accepted female aggression" like, try to wrap your head around that. If it's "accepted" how is it a "threat," and to what? Dudes like being whipped by ladies. That's pretty much the end of the story.
  • "MASTERLY POWERS OF FEMALE DOMINATION" was what was written on Jessica Fletcher's business card (or should've been)

Page 123~
Don finished his drink and set it on the dresser, then walked over to the edge of the bed he reached down to the back of her thighs, gently separated them and commenced to kiss the small of her back. His tongue went to her pink lined crease. Slowly he flicked it downward until he had gone as far as he  could go, then pushing her thighs upward, he held her almost on her head. He kept moving downward gradually, pushing her upward. When he found the desired spot, Roxana moaned through her fallen hair. He then shoved her backwards until she was on her back in an opposite direction. Now, he could feel her mouth covering him as they clasped each other's passionate bodies tightly.
Ok so this is terrible in so many ways but I'm stuck back on "pink lined crease" (sic). Is her lined crease pink, or is her crease pink-lined? And which crease are we talking about? Further, where did his tongue go? Where did her thighs go? Downward? Upward? "An opposite direction"? It looks like they end up in 69 at the end, but I feel like maybe that was just a lucky accident?


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Tuesday, June 4, 2019

Paperback 1041: Draw the Curtain Close / Thomas B. Dewey (Pocket Books 64003)

Paperback 1041: Pocket Books 64003 (1st ptg, 1968)

Title: Draw the Curtain Close
Author: Thomas B. Dewey
Cover artist: Uncredited (looks like Harry Bennett signature)

Condition: 4/10
Estimated value: $100000000 (jk prob like $5 but I can't find this copy online)

[Contribution from Cassie and Jordan Bell-Masterson]

Best things about this cover:

  • Well, not his face
  • Well, not the font
  • This is such an odd moment to document on a book cover. Is she taking off her shirt? Not such a big reveal if she was clearly already sitting there pantsless. Is that even a shirt? It looks like she's trying to wear a pair of red shorts as a shirt. Maybe she's not well. Shapely, though, I'll give her that. And armed.
  • She needs to repaint that room; it's making me nauseated.
  • I love the "modesty sheet" that is conveniently obscuring her butt crack from view.
  • It doesn't matter what she does or doesn't wear because nothing is going to outshine that chalked-up denim suit that Flatface McSkinnyTie has on.
  • This is apparently a hard-boiled writer of some repute, the first book in his "Mac" series. Since this is a "reading copy," I should clearly, uh, read it.

Best things about this back cover:

  • He Took His Hat Off, WHY!? I need to know. You can't just shove him into a tiny strip of red, remove his hat, and expect me NOT to have questions!
  • I love that this is a book about expensive books. And showbiz dolls.
  • None of my books are worth 30 Gs. Alas.
  • Wait, is the fact that he's not "a literary type" supposed to endear him to me. Because if so, mission decidedly unaccomplished.

Page 123~
I had to wait a couple of minutes for the elevator. I shared it going down with a cockeyed lady in a red satin dress who hiccoughed regularly at intervals of three or four seconds. Halfway down she said without warning, "Hi, Mac."
Just now realizing that a. "hiccoughed" is a freaky-looking word and b. this dude must get a lot of false alarms where someone calling his name is concerned, what with all the "Hey, Mac"s floating around in the world. It's like his name is "Buddy" or "Pal" or "Chief" or "Bruh."


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Monday, June 3, 2019

Paperback 1040: Inflamed Trio / Charles Fay (Emerald Reader 107)

Paperback 1040: Emerald Reader 107 (PBO, 1964)

Title: Inflamed Trio
Author: Charles Fay
Cover artist: photo cover

Condition: 8/10 (unread, square, bright, but some scuffing, and w/ pub. page torn out??)
Estimated value: $15-20

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

  • It's hard to find a good nostril model.
  • Nude Model Museum Rugby is a rough sport. This player has clearly hurt her knee and will have to come out.
  • Is it really a good idea to lean against the painting like that? After all, that's an original [squints] Rubano?
  • Wow, those are ... some words.
  • Don't discriminate against backs. Be a friend to backs. Be a back ally.
  • What the hell is "Sinports" even a pun on?? Car ports? Imports? Sun porch?
  • They've playfully covered up the "Inflamed Trio," i.e. her nipples and the patch of eczema above her right elbow.

Best things about this back cover:

  • "Which do you think would look better on my business card: 'Artist in Sin' or 'Sin Artist By Choice'? Oh never mind, I'll ask my mom. Hey, MOM! ..."
  • Honestly, I've seen scores of these tag line / ellipsis / nonsense cover copy / ellipsis / tag line back covers—they are a staple of '60s sex fiction back covers—but this one is the first to exhaust me. It's like being bludgeoned with nonsensically bad grammar. Good luck making it all the way to the IGNITED CARNALITY
  • "As a simile from another story herein" ... if you have any idea what this sentence means, let me know. It's as confusing as a simile.
  • LOL "trio"—did they just scare-quote the book's own title. That's pretty meta.

Page 123~
A few well dressed agents with bulging client books and nervous, hopeful clinets at their sides, glanced at Ronald with interest.
I know it looks like I've made some typing errors in transcribing that quotation, but I assure you I have not. Not a one. I'm imagining "clinets" as a kind of medium-sized, reclusive panda-cat. It's too bad only one clinet can get the part. Good luck, clinets! I hope you land that well [space] dressed agent!


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P.S. there are typos on like every page of this book. Also, the font, my god:

"traffice?" that's onsense!

Tuesday, May 28, 2019

Paperback 1039: The Bridge Over the River Kwai / Pierre Boulle (Bantam HP4391)

Paperback 1039: Bantam HP4391 (35th ptg, 1970)

Title: The Bridge Over the River Kwai
Author: Pierre Boulle
Cover artist: Barye Phillips

Condition: 8/10
Estimated value: $5

Best things about this cover:
  • My wife actually spotted this one on the $1 cart outside the bookstore. My initial immediate response was "meh" but then I held it and noticed a. the condition (excellent) and b. the quality of the art, which really is exquisite. 
  • I love how Bantam has let the cover breathe. You can see how they might've used the painting differently, maybe cropping it differently and putting text (title / author) in or on top of the red sky. But this way, the painting really feels like a painting, and that sky is allowed to take up space and create its mood. The composition is also arresting.
  • Me: "I know this artist ... Kalin? ... Hooks? ... [looks very closely at painting] oh, man, it's Barye Phillips!" Phillips signs simply "Barye," which you can see just to the left (your left) of the Japanese soldier's hand. I'm used to seeing girl art / crime fiction scenes from him, so this was cool and unexpected. 
Best things about this back cover:
  • Again: rooooom for my eyes to breeeeeathe. I like.
  • No need to waste time (i.e. words) when dealing with a book this well known (from the 1957 movie). Both front and back covers really do go in for more of a museum treatment than a typical book promo treatment.
Page 123~
Never before had he been conscious of that feeling of power and conquest which absolute isolation affords, whether on a mountaintop or in the bowels of the earth.

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Friday, May 17, 2019

Paperback 1038: The Fugitive Eye / Charlotte Jay (Avon 670)

Paperback 1038: Avon 670 (1st ptg, 1955)

Title: The Fugitive Eye
Author: Charlotte Jay
Cover artist: [George Ziel]

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $5-7

Best things about this cover:
  • "Uh, hey ... I was just ... she was ... I ... just clearing some brush, you know ... at night, in my suit ... it's totally normal, everything's normal"
  • Is that her dress, or did she die inside a giant salmon?
  • Talk about a fugitive eye. I'm over here, buddy!
  • Fear Hand (male edition)
Best things about this back cover:
  • "How do we convey the sheer terror!?" "Maybe write it on a slant?" "OMG THAT IS TERRIFYING!"
  • "Don't start this..." LOL, OK!
  • I'm mad at "Invariably"; yeah, you heard me, Cincinnati Times-Star
  • "MISS"—we got ourselves an unmarried Aussie authoress, boys!
  • "Beat Not the Bones" never doesn't make me laugh
Page 123~
But as he looked around his gaze met no human face.
There was this one raccoon face, but raccoons probably couldn't testify in court, thought Steve


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