Paperback 1134: Call Boy / Tony Calvin (Ember Books EB 907)

Paperback 1134: Ember Books EB 907 (PBO, 1963)

Title: Call Boy

Author: Tony Calvin (pseud. of Thomas P. Ramirez)

Cover artist: Uncredited

Condition: 9.5/10

Value: $40

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover: 

• "Hi, I know you only called for a single boy, but I brought back-up, just in case. We don't have nipples, I hope that's OK. What we lack in nipples, we make up for in sheer Wonder-Twin enthusiasm, I promise!"
• The cover copy wants me to think this is all very tawdry, but look at how happy they look. It almost seems wholesome, honestly.
• I wish I could properly explain how immaculate this book is. Obviously unread, bright as the sun, with only some superficial edgewear between it and a perfect 10 condition rating.
• Love her modesty hair, and modesty cash, but I wouldn't look too hard at the cash if I were you. It's like some early version of A.I. made it. Wonky and wrong in every way. Looks like it was issued by the country of "Reptilia"

Best things about this back cover: 

• Ember Books ... is yet another imprint in what is clearly a sleaze empire of the '60s. Nightstand Books, Ember Library, Companion Books, Sundown Reader, and on and on, there's a uniformity to the size and color scheme and artwork and ludicrousness, but it's this back cover copy that really feels the same across imprints—again, it's as if some early version of A.I. was asked to write cover copy for a '60s sleaze paperback and it just churned out a bunch of words that individually feel right ("strange," "twisted," "secret," "stud-mistress," "lust," "flesh," "bondage," "shame," "sin," etc.), but together add up to empty (and particularly unsexy) nonsense.
• I don't see anything like "shame" or "degradation" on the front cover. What I see is a mostly naked sleepover party. With Monopoly money.
• The wages of sin!? The wages of sin is death (Romans 6:23). Whereas the Wages of Fear is a classic 1953 thriller by the great French director Henri-Georges Clouzot, which was the basis for William Friedkin's fantastic Sorcerer (1977).

Page 123~

His surprise, as he opened the door to find the portly, medium-tall man standing there, left him totally speechless for at least thirty seconds. The doorknob seemingly froze in his fingers. This must be some kind of a joke. A man? Certainly Odile doesn't expect me to ... There's a damn limit, after all.

First: is there a limit, Stark Campion? Is there? I guess we'll see. 

Second: This paragraph works a lot better if you think of "the doorknob" as, well, a metaphor

~RP

P.S. I had to turn comments moderation on because of creeps. Please feel free to comment (I love hearing from people who love these books the way I do), but just know that publication of your comment will be delayed for a bit. And if your comments are Trumpist or homophobic or in any way hateful, they're never getting through. Please find another blog to pollute. Thank you!

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and BlueSky]

Paperback 1125: The Passion Hunters / Orrie Hitt (Domino Books 72-712)

Paperback 1125: Domino Books 72-712 (PBO, 1964)

Title: The Passion Hunters    

Author: Orrie Hitt

Cover artist: Uncredited

Condition: 4-5/10

Value: $10

[Chapter 2 Books, Winona, MN (July 2025)]

Best things about this cover: 

• Gee, your nose smells terrific!
• "Kissing's when I talk into your nose, right?"
• She's gonna have to open her eyes if she ever wants their faces to line up properly
• It looks like it's raining exclusively in her bed and on his shirt, with some kind of green aurora borealis in the background
• I keep quickly glancing at the cover copy and seeing the phrase "mouth-open season," which, given the picture, seems right

Best things about this back cover: 

• Fair game! It's a pun! Because they are pretty ("fair") and you hunt them. Or else they are a game you play at a carnival booth, like the ring toss. He does seem to be trying to bend her body into some kind of shape, perhaps in order to win a giant stuffed animal. "I thought you liked me, Brad. What about that embrace at the carnival booth?" "I was just trying to bend you into a knot so I could win that panda!"
• I am shocked, shocked, I say, to find that this Orrie Hitt book doesn't seem to have much of a plot. He's going deer-hunting. But he wants sex and money. But he'll settle for sex. Hitt me!
• "A trio of torrid temptresses!" Somewhere, there's a dyad of dumpy dames going "Hey, what about us!?"

Page 123~

Getting over the beaver channels was the worst, and before I cleared the swamp I didn't have to continue worrying about dropping him. He was already dead, the knife still in his belly, and from there on down the mountain I was an undertaker without a license.

OK, technically this is from p. 122, but once I saw the phrase "Getting over the beaver channels," there was no turning back. You understand.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and BlueSky]

Paperback 1122: The Bloody Medallion / Richard Telfair (Gold Medal d1665)

Paperback 1122: Gold Medal d1665 (2nd ptg, 1966)

Title: The Bloody Medallion

Author: Richard Telfair (Richard Jessup)

Cover artist: Bill Johnson

Condition: 6/10    

Value: $6-8

[from Stomping Grounds bookstore, Geneva, NY (6/24/25)]

Best things about this cover: 

• Buddy! It's OK, buddy, I just walked into the wrong room, I'm leaving now. Good dog.
• More dogs on covers! More, I say!
• I know there is an attractive naked lady on this cover, but ... puppy!
• That dog is looking directly at me. I have no idea what the lady is looking at.
• Is she bathing ... in a six-inch-deep hole? What kind of bathtub is that? It looks like she's standing in a flooded bathroom. Maybe she's supposed to be outdoors? Seriously, where are we in this picture?
• Look at them try to trick you into thinking this is a Sax Rohmer novel. I've never seen a blurb writer's name get displayed more prominently than that of the author. And they made Sax's name red like the title, too. Crafty marketers...

Best things about this back cover: 

• Blood stains? That's it? Abstract red splatters? Where's buddy? I miss buddy.
• Gay revenge story! (I'm just gonna assume "best friend" is a euphemism). Love it! 
• Seriously, putting it on the "to read" pile. I love a good (or even bad) revenge tale. Telfair's name rings a bell, but I'm not sure why. Richard Jessup seems to have written a half dozen or so crime paperbacks under this name in the span of about four years (1959-62).

Page 123~

    "Strip," I said.

    Dutifully he began taking off his clothes. When he was nude, I ordered him to the water's edge.

I'm just gonna stop there. It's sexier that way.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and BlueSky]

Paperback 1068: Under Heaven's Bridge / Michael Bishop & Ian Watson (Ace SF 84481-2)

Paperback 1068: Ace SF 84481-2 (1st Ace printing, April 1982)

Title: Under Heaven's Bridge

Author: Michael Bishop & Ian Watson

Cover artist: Don Punchatz (per isfdb)

Condition: 6/10

Value: $5-8

Best things about this cover:

• Man, I cannot wait to see Lion King 3000, it looks fucking awesome!
• Alien baby-lifting really is the best exercise for building strong lats. Look at the definition on this dude!
• I have this sick feeling he's about to bring that little guy right down on top of his helmet and all I can say is I hope this is all consensual.
• Again, I seem to have drifted into the '80s with some of my recent acquisitions. But then the '80s are to now what the '50s were to the time when I started collecting, so maybe this time shift was to be expected.

Best things about this back cover:

• Aw, jeez, nothing. One of them text-only back covers. As always, boo.
• I normally take price stickers off, but this one's not coming off without taken a huge chunk of the cover with it, so ... just gonna leave it.
• I do love that the back cover just expects you to know what a Giacometti sculpture looks like: "Look it up, you Philistines!" I guess those creatures of the cover kinda do look like the Walking Man:

Page 123~

This time he made no move to hinder her, and, bemused and fretful, she escaped to the frigid safety of the Platform.

"Bemused and Fretful," of course, the B-side to Talking Heads' "Crosseyed and Painless"

[Follow Pop Sensation on Instagram @popsensationpaperbacks]

Paperback 1051: The Big Sqeeze / Christopher Athens (Chicago House A102)

Paperback 1051: Chicago House A102 (PBO, 1962)

Title: The Big Squeeze
Author: Christopher Athens
Cover artist: Uncredited (!!!?)

Condition: 9/10
Value: $15-20

Best things about this cover:

• Billy woulda taken first place at the 9th grade art show for sure but the judges said his rad painting, which is obviously a commentary on free speech, had "sexual content" and they totally disqualified him, like what is this, Soviet Russia? Bogus.
• Seriously, though, what is happening?
• The dude ... did the dude forget his ... shoe? Is that a shoe? A tipped over bag of groceries? A melted turntable? I know I should be focused on the naked ladies, but...
• Are they going up or down? Also, why? Also, is Red dead? Also, why?
• Protip: cover one of the most important visual elements of your cover with giant block letters so the reader has no idea wtf is going on. It's avant-garde!
• This book is in perfect condition ... is the best thing I can say about this book.

Best things about this back cover:

• OK, right off the bat, I can tell you the cover copy writer has limited experience with what we in the writing business call "verbs."
• BRB, relabeling all my booze "Parts Cleaner"
• "Three-and-a-half bells?" Are we at sea?
• "This pair of chicks tried to pick me up once and ... what? You don't know them. They live in Canada. ANYway, these totally real chicks..."
• Who the f is "Tom Anthony"?

Page 123~

"Brush my teeth," I said, holding a hand in front of my mouth.

"Oh," exhaled Barbara. "When you said 'oral' I thought ... well, nevermind what I thought ..."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1045: Abnormal Lover / Clark Connor (Merit Book 507)

Paperback 1045: Merit Book 507 (2nd ptg, 1961)

Title: Abnormal Lover
Author: Clark Connor
Cover artist: "Sloane" (uncredited)

Condition: 8/10
Estimated value: $20-25

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• Jesus H, what kind of corset injury did she suffer as a young woman!?
• I love how she's like, "Yeah, they're stretch marks, so what!? I don't see you looking away!"
• I'm all for that vest-only look, but the pants seem a little ... bunchy.
• O god, her hand! Was that part of the corset accident!? I'm just glad she overcame adversity and went on to live her truth.
• "Bru-" is killing me. KILLING ME. How are you this bad at layout!?
• I assume her left pinky is the "point of perversion" in question.

Best things about this back cover:

• Better in black and white
• And the winner for Worst Compound Adjective in a Back Cover Blurb goes to ...
• I love how proud the artist ("Sloane!") was of this painting. "Y'all aren't cropping out my signature, dammit. I WILL LIVE THRU THE AGES!"

Page 123~

"I can't, Raymond. I don't have time to see Art Meric. I have to leave on a trip. A very important trip, Raymond!"
A long silence.
"What's wrong, Raymond? Raymond! Raymond!"

"I"m not going to be IGNORED, Raymond..."

Also

🎶"Everywhere around the world / They come to see Art Meric-a"🎶

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1042: Bartered Mates / Thomas K. Makagon (Unique Books 144)

Paperback 1042: Unique Books 144 (PBO, 1967)

Title: Bartered Mates
Author: Thomas K. Makagon
Cover artist: that guy ... I always forget his name ... one of you will tell me (Bill Alexander)

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: a lot

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• I keep reading "Battered Meats"
• Get it on! Bang a gong! Makagon!
• The pointing lady is the best. We don't even get to see her face. Just her amazing get-up and pointing arm. "J'accuse!" "Koochy koochy koo!" "Where Are This Man's Damned Nipples!?"
• I really dig The Couch Of Impossible Boobs
• If you look at his left foot too long you will be cursed. I have warned you.
• This book is bizarrely rare. I searched ["bartered mates" makagon] and got TWO HITS TOTAL

Best things about this back cover:

• I've seen worse cover copy, but not much worse. I do like the manic use of "—" there in the first paragraph. "Is it a happening, a trend, or a switch ... ? ... fuck it, let's just go with all of the above!"
• Why is there a comma after "delectable" in paragraph 2!?! Truly, I am bothered far more by punctuation minutiae than by the preposterous cheesiness of it all.
• OK the first sentence of paragraph 2 is utterly ungrammatical (although LOL at "brain child" quote unquote)
• Shouldn't it be "a between-pictures diversion" OK I'll stop now.
• "... the private threats of enjoyed and accepted female aggression" like, try to wrap your head around that. If it's "accepted" how is it a "threat," and to what? Dudes like being whipped by ladies. That's pretty much the end of the story.
• "MASTERLY POWERS OF FEMALE DOMINATION" was what was written on Jessica Fletcher's business card (or should've been)

Page 123~

Don finished his drink and set it on the dresser, then walked over to the edge of the bed he reached down to the back of her thighs, gently separated them and commenced to kiss the small of her back. His tongue went to her pink lined crease. Slowly he flicked it downward until he had gone as far as he  could go, then pushing her thighs upward, he held her almost on her head. He kept moving downward gradually, pushing her upward. When he found the desired spot, Roxana moaned through her fallen hair. He then shoved her backwards until she was on her back in an opposite direction. Now, he could feel her mouth covering him as they clasped each other's passionate bodies tightly.

Ok so this is terrible in so many ways but I'm stuck back on "pink lined crease" (sic). Is her lined crease pink, or is her crease pink-lined? And which crease are we talking about? Further, where did his tongue go? Where did her thighs go? Downward? Upward? "An opposite direction"? It looks like they end up in 69 at the end, but I feel like maybe that was just a lucky accident?

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1041: Draw the Curtain Close / Thomas B. Dewey (Pocket Books 64003)

Paperback 1041: Pocket Books 64003 (1st ptg, 1968)

Title: Draw the Curtain Close
Author: Thomas B. Dewey
Cover artist: Uncredited (looks like Harry Bennett signature)

Condition: 4/10
Estimated value: $100000000 (jk prob like $5 but I can't find this copy online)

[Contribution from Cassie and Jordan Bell-Masterson]

Best things about this cover:

• Well, not his face
• Well, not the font
• This is such an odd moment to document on a book cover. Is she taking off her shirt? Not such a big reveal if she was clearly already sitting there pantsless. Is that even a shirt? It looks like she's trying to wear a pair of red shorts as a shirt. Maybe she's not well. Shapely, though, I'll give her that. And armed.
• She needs to repaint that room; it's making me nauseated.
• I love the "modesty sheet" that is conveniently obscuring her butt crack from view.
• It doesn't matter what she does or doesn't wear because nothing is going to outshine that chalked-up denim suit that Flatface McSkinnyTie has on.
• This is apparently a hard-boiled writer of some repute, the first book in his "Mac" series. Since this is a "reading copy," I should clearly, uh, read it.

Best things about this back cover:

• He Took His Hat Off, WHY!? I need to know. You can't just shove him into a tiny strip of red, remove his hat, and expect me NOT to have questions!
• I love that this is a book about expensive books. And showbiz dolls.
• None of my books are worth 30 Gs. Alas.
• Wait, is the fact that he's not "a literary type" supposed to endear him to me. Because if so, mission decidedly unaccomplished.

Page 123~

I had to wait a couple of minutes for the elevator. I shared it going down with a cockeyed lady in a red satin dress who hiccoughed regularly at intervals of three or four seconds. Halfway down she said without warning, "Hi, Mac."

Just now realizing that a. "hiccoughed" is a freaky-looking word and b. this dude must get a lot of false alarms where someone calling his name is concerned, what with all the "Hey, Mac"s floating around in the world. It's like his name is "Buddy" or "Pal" or "Chief" or "Bruh."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1040: Inflamed Trio / Charles Fay (Emerald Reader 107)

Paperback 1040: Emerald Reader 107 (PBO, 1964)

Title: Inflamed Trio
Author: Charles Fay
Cover artist: photo cover

Condition: 8/10 (unread, square, bright, but some scuffing, and w/ pub. page torn out??)
Estimated value: $15-20

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• It's hard to find a good nostril model.
• Nude Model Museum Rugby is a rough sport. This player has clearly hurt her knee and will have to come out.
• Is it really a good idea to lean against the painting like that? After all, that's an original [squints] Rubano?
• Wow, those are ... some words.
• Don't discriminate against backs. Be a friend to backs. Be a back ally.
• What the hell is "Sinports" even a pun on?? Car ports? Imports? Sun porch?
• They've playfully covered up the "Inflamed Trio," i.e. her nipples and the patch of eczema above her right elbow.

Best things about this back cover:

• "Which do you think would look better on my business card: 'Artist in Sin' or 'Sin Artist By Choice'? Oh never mind, I'll ask my mom. Hey, MOM! ..."
• Honestly, I've seen scores of these tag line / ellipsis / nonsense cover copy / ellipsis / tag line back covers—they are a staple of '60s sex fiction back covers—but this one is the first to exhaust me. It's like being bludgeoned with nonsensically bad grammar. Good luck making it all the way to the IGNITED CARNALITY
• "As a simile from another story herein" ... if you have any idea what this sentence means, let me know. It's as confusing as a simile.
• LOL "trio"—did they just scare-quote the book's own title. That's pretty meta.

Page 123~

A few well dressed agents with bulging client books and nervous, hopeful clinets at their sides, glanced at Ronald with interest.

I know it looks like I've made some typing errors in transcribing that quotation, but I assure you I have not. Not a one. I'm imagining "clinets" as a kind of medium-sized, reclusive panda-cat. It's too bad only one clinet can get the part. Good luck, clinets! I hope you land that well [space] dressed agent!

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

P.S. there are typos on like every page of this book. Also, the font, my god:

"traffice?" that's onsense!

Paperback 1037: Send Another Hearse / Harold Q. Masur (Dell 7737)

Paperback 1037: Dell 7737 (1st ptg, 1965)

Title: Send Another Hearse
Author: Harold Q. Masur
Cover artist: Greene (so he's just Greene, now? like Prince?) (see artist credit on back)

Condition: 10/10
Estimated value: $12
Best things about this cover:

• "I have other creative talents," whispered the brunette. Throatily, she added, "I hang wallpaper."
• I love Scott Jordan's expression. "Just gonna light this cigarette and settle in to watch this wallpaper-hanger lady take her clothes off and ... [ding dong] ... what the!? Goddammit, why did I even bother getting a No Solicitors sign if no one's gonna ****ing RESPECT it!?"
• I also love how jaded the title is. "Yep ... yeah ... I don't know, someone else died, I guess ... no we can't put 'em in the same hearse, you moron. SEND ANOTHER HEARSE!"

Best things about this back cover:

• That is not a martini glass. That is the Holy Grail.
• "Scott"? Come on. P.I.s go by last names. You switch to "Jordan" eventually, so your dumb first-name gambit actually makes everything weirdly unclear. Nevermind that both "Scott" and "Jordan" can be both first and last names. It's a mess. Just stick with last names, and you're good, man.
• What kind of chump just *opens* the hotel room door? No "Who is it?" or anything?

Page 123~

And, quite irrelevantly, I thought how various parts of the human anatomy behave differently under stress.

I think he's saying his penis is irrelevant, but who can be sure?

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1026: Purless Sex Cat / Jon Basell (Compass Line CL 130)

Paperback 1026: Compass Line CL 130 (PBO, 1966)

Title: Purless Sex Cat
Author: Jon Basell
Cover artist: Uncredited

Condition: 8/10
Estimated value: $40-50

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• I forced a bot to look at 1000 vintage sleaze paperback covers and then asked it to design a cover of its own. This is the result.
• What even is this? Any of this? It's like something from the Island of Dr. Moreau, but in book form. The colors? Terrible. The weird geometric shapes? Ridiculous. His torso looks like the face of drunk Homer Simpson. And then there's "Purless." Purless. Look, I don't know what happened here, but if this is Purless, then I say someone needs to Pur more. A lot more.
• The phrase is "sex kitten," you language-maiming Turing Test failure.
• Her ass is for "Adults Only," which seems totally reasonable, although I can't imagine why any non-deranged "minor" would want to buy this confusing trash heap.
• "From sex to limitless sex" is easily the greatest play on "from sea to shining sea" that ever was or will be.
• Dear lord, his cyan briefs will haunt my dreams for months.

Best things about this back cover:

• Well, they forgot to print the lead-in all-caps tagline, so there's that?
• This sentence has no beginning, no end, no purpose, no dignity, its erotic body never sated, demanding and loving rambling with commas and they too know from others that physical satisfaction is flitting from sex to sex in their ... RUTTING REVERIES
• Pink. I like the pink. Yes. It's pleasant. Like a nicely iced cupcake. 

Page 123~

     So I acted real helpless and weak while the skindiver helped me out of the water and on up the shore of the island. It was real comical the way his face got all red when he got a good look at how naked I was. Or maybe it was because he was naked, too.
     "Th-thank you," I gasped, while he got even redder and said that his camp was a few feet away and maybe some whiskey would make us both feel better."

Well I know some whiskey would make me feel better after that linguistic atrocity so byeeee

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1016: Sex Diary / Nat Brand (Hi-Hat 103)

Paperback 1016: Hi-Hat HH 103 (PBO, 1963)

Title: Sex Diary
Author: Nat Brand
Cover artist: [Uncredited]

Condition: 9/10 (tiny notch up top, else Perfect)
Estimated value: $20-25

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• Oh, sorry, I see you're studying. I'll come back later.
• "Knock knock" "Who's there?" "ORAL" "ORAL who?" "ORAL the salacious sight gags used up or do you have one more you'd like to try out?"
• Of all the disturbing things here, the most disturbing is that either that dude wants to put beer in a martini glass or else that gin needs a bottle opener (?!). Or else that's champagne, in which case everything is wrong, burn it all down...
• Oh, and her mouth. That is also disturbing. The mouth-to-Everything-Else ratio is way, way off.

Best things about this back cover:

• As if this back cover type were not hilarious enough, this one omits the closing phrase! It's supposed to go "RIDICULOUS OPENING PHRASE... / Cover copy that sounds like it was written by a prurient 11-yr-old then translated into Ukrainian then Portuguese then Urdu then back to English again... / RIDICULOUS CLOSING PHRASE." I have countless examples of this very type of back cover. And yet, here, I am forced to use my imagination to finish off the final sentence. The depraved inkstains of her WHAT!?!?! LUST PEN? SIN QUILL? I'm gonna lose sleep over this.
• "The entries of the facts of her lust sessions" ... [steps back, admires wordsmithery, kisses fingertips] ... MWAH!
• "Penetrating pen" ... "every shocking inch" ... The subtlety! It's maddening!

Page 123~

His hands slid haltingly on her belly.

I think we're done here.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1015: Three-And-A-Half Women / Fred May (Private Edition 372)

Paperback 1015: Private Edition PE 372 (PBO, 1966)

Title: Three-And-A-Half Women
Author: Fred May
Cover artist: [Uncredited]

Condition: 9/10 (I mean, square, unread, bright, wow)
Estimated value: Priceless ... also, I don't see this book anywhere on the internets, so ???

Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection

Best things about this cover:

• The paperback cover gods giveth and the paperback cover gods taketh away and sometimes the paperback cover gods give you so much that it is simply overwhelming and it feels like punishment
• I want to start with the hair. Her hair ... OK, moving on
• This is One, One-And-A-Half Women, tops
• One-And-Three-Quarters Buttcheeks
• I feel like there is a black hole located somewhere under the bed that is exerting its gravitational pull in remarkably distorting ways. It's literally pulling him off the bed. Or else he's taking a knee in solidarity with Colin Kaepernick, not sure.
• Someone was absent during Perspective day in art class. How big is that bed? How short is her left calf? What is that rope-holding peg even attached to??
• His Fear Hand™!! (O god I *hope* that's just Fear Hand™ and not him trying to suppress something pushing up from under his camisole...)

Best things about this back cover: 

• Nothing says "erotic reading" like "squatted" and (le mot juste) "haunches."
• "Puzzled" made me literally LOL
• Wait, how does he get his kicks??? All he did was leer at and/or ogle her, and she somehow knows about his kicks? Is flicking your eyes and wetting your lips code for something now? Is he just really into squatting haunches?

Page 123~

Betty now knew, of course, that Paul was the young man with whom Jill had spent the time in bed. She assumed that he had enjoyed the experience very much and was there to stake his claim. She also knew that Jill was basictlly [sic] a man's girl. Betty had conflicting emotions.

Ah yes, who can forget the young man with whom one had spent the time in bed? The time in bed is indeed worthy of fond recollection by those by whom it was experienced. Sex is something we humans are determinedly enjoying and no I am not a "bot" what is a "bot"?

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1011: She Wouldn't Surrender / James Kendricks (Monarch MA301)

Paperback 1011: Monarch MA301 (PBO, 1960)

Title: She Wouldn't Surrender
Author: James Kendricks
Cover artist: [Robert Maguire] (attribution from here) (and here)

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $20-25

Best things about this cover:

• Wow, this really ticks all the boxes: naked redhead with a gun, painted by Robert Maguire, posing as "Americana," on one of the greatest mainstream sleaze imprints of the 20th century. Monarch Books got some of the greatest cover artists to work for them, and I love how they had all these subseries designed to give their softcore books a patina of respectabilty. Who could quibble with your passion for "Americana"!? Communists, that's who.
• "Whoa, a *real* redhead! Wait'll I tell Wilb-" [gets shot in the neck]
• My favorite part of this cover is weirdly her hat

Best things about this back cover:

• Hmmm. It sounds like she *would* surrender, sometimes.
• Sure, your girl has charms, but do they pulsate? Do They!?
• OK, "Only the dead were incapable of remembering her" is kind of a good line
• 🎶Wanton eyes! They're watching you! They see your Union boots...🎶

Page 123~

[nah, I don't like this page—it's all gruesome war stuff: horses being maimed and what not ... I much much prefer the teaser text on the opening page, headlined NAKED ENCOUNTER]

The soldier whirled. His eyes bulged at the sight of the naked girl, her magnificent breasts jouncing as she stopped abruptly to stare back at him wantonly [...] Too late he saw the weapon in her hand. Too long he had stared at the undulating breasts, the quivering eyes, the tantalizing smile...

JOUNCING! Part jiggling, part bouncing, all *deadly*!

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 1008: Rogue Queen / L. Sprague de Camp (Dell 600)

Paperback 1008: Dell 600 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: Rogue Queen
Author: L. Sprague de Camp
Cover artist: Mike Ludlow

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $8-10

Best things about this cover:

• That seems a reasonable way to learn about sex tbh
• "OK, so, step 1: put the spear away"—Earth-man
• I'm sure that phallic rocket is in no way a phallic symbol
• That is some very convenient cape and forearm
• Her hair is amazing

Best things about this back cover:

• "You ... complete ... me ... seriously, do it, complete me, I'm not a woman yet, get on with it."
• You take the good you take the bad you take them both and there you have the Facts of Full Womanhood, The Facts of Full Womanhood!
• That is the sloppiest damn ringed planet I even did see. It's like a 5-year-old drew a ball of yarn

Page 123~

"It is a curious feature of Terran culture that when the men do something of a stupidity they always blame their wives."

I like her.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 999: All Shot Up / Chester Himes (Ace T-434)

Paperback 999: Avon T-434 (PBO, 1960)

Title: All Shot Up
Author: Chester Himes
Cover artist: Uncredited (!!) (update: appears to be work of George Ziel)

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $65-80

Best things about this cover:

• Gah, so great. So so great. Multiple scenes of hot hardboiled greatness. Tough-guy mug, sexy naked lady, trenchcoat gunfight ... bar! All the good things.
• Chester Himes is fantastic. Coffin Ed and Grave Digger are unique and important figures in the history of detective fiction. Badass *and* hilarious. Their dialogue is amazing, as are their razor-sharp observations on race relations in the city. Highly recommended.
• Either that dude is holding the wrong end of the cigarette or he's holding a very tiny test tube.

Best things about this back cover:

• Big on alliteration, this copywriter. First babes bourbon and bullets, now hailing in Harlem...
• "Eight—Count 'em, eight—corpses." Eight, OK, I believe you, eight. Jeez. Don't get so defensive.
• "Skidding on ice and breathing fire"—which Game of Thrones book was that?

Page 123~

"I'd rather be bit in the rear by a boa constrictor than sitting here waiting for something to happen, and I can't even guess what," he complained bitterly.

It's a boa constrictor ... I mean it can bite, sure, but ... it's kind of known for ... the other ... oh nevermind.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 997: The Mask on a Wanton's Torso / John Reade (Venus VV104)

Paperback 997: Venus Books VV104 (PBO, 1964)

Title: The Mask on a Wanton's Torso*
Author: John Reade
Cover artist: a photographer in the anteroom of hell

Condition: 9/10
Estimated value: $20-ish

[newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• Looking at this cover is about as close to watching a snuff film as I'll ever come. It's horrifying. I feel like the cameraman murdered her like five seconds after this shot was taken. Or else she was paid in heroin and sent back out into the snow dressed just like that. Most of my sleaze paperbacks are campy fun to look at. This one, no, not.
• If you burn that couch, hundreds of damned souls are unleashed into the world, to torture and haunt the living.
• "Here, put this on"—the world's most negligent art director
• Ah, the world of erotic nonsense phrases—so delicious. Lust game! Sin secret! Wanton's torso!?!?
• *You see how I put an asterisk by the title (up top)? That's because ... well, how to describe it? This book is unique, in my experience, in having a title on the cover that Does Not Match The Title On The Spine (which reads "The Mask *OF* the Wanton's Torso"(!?)). But it's uniqueness doesn't stop there. Forget two titles—this book .... Has Two Authors: WHO IS PHIL BOTNER?!

And the back cover:

Best things about this back cover:

• Stud Hunter! I think I own one of those.
• Shame event! Passion fling!  FLESH GAIETY!!! Beat that ... every other back cover sleaze copywriter.
• That's not how en dashes work.
• Yikes, even the line spacing on this is disgusting.

Page 123~ (brace yourself)

There was a door there. She could not remember how she had come upstairs. Frantically she opened it. There was only a tiny passageway, leading to another door. Frantically she thought it might be a back way down, down and out of this house.

Torn between laughing at Double Frantically and crying at the attempted poetry of that second "down,."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 965: Ruby MacLaine / John Roeburt (Hillman 151)

Paperback 965: Hillman Books 151 (PBO, 1960)

Title: Ruby MacLaine
Author: John Roeburt
Cover artist: Uncredited

Estimated value: $6-9
Condition: 3/10

Best things about this cover:

• So ... that is a plausibly human head, torso, and backside. After that, the wheels come off. She would have to have 10-ft-long legs for that foot size to be right. Also, no one can stand like that and not put at least *some* pressure on the bedclothes. But mostly, the problem is perspective. The bed looks like it's for a child, and the lamp and bedstand are comically small. Trump-hand tiny. Dollhouse tiny.
• Still, credit where credit is due: the backside makes it highly unlikely anyone's fretting too much about the mini-furniture.
• "FEEL MY MORBID POWER!" exclaimed a drunk and exultant John Roeburt as he stumbled along Broadway, a rumpled New York Times in his hand.

Best things about this back cover:

• See. Back cover designer knew what to do with that front cover: CROP.
• "Backstreet"? Take that, N*SYNC!
• "There'll be compensations" is an utterly implausible bit of dialogue. Also, I was proposing ... asking ..." makes no sense. You were proposing or you were asking, but you were not proposing asking. Although maybe a guy who ruffles a girl's hair as a come-on has bigger problems than grammar.

Page 123~

"I want to be admired for my mind," Ruby said winkingly.
Coulter looked critically at her. "That was on the square," he said slowly.
She looked levelly at him. "I want resources other than just my sex."

Later, Coulter says, "I get the dig." That makes one of us, Coulter.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

P.S. the first line on the first (teaser) page of this novel is: "They made their agreement in a motel." I probably would've bought this book on the strength of that premise alone.

Paperback 949: Play the Sin Field / Drew Deskins (Spartan Line SL134)

Paperback 949: Spartan Line SL134 (PBO, 1966)

Title: Play the Sin Field
Author: Drew Deskins
Cover artist: presumably

Estimated value: No idea. Somehow, I have TWO copies of this, and yet there are NO copies at abebooks. :(
Condition: 8/10

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• Holy crap, I only *just* realized that this is supposed to be a pun on the phrase, "play the infield." Before, I thought a. wow, they just threw the word SIN in to a perfectly good phrase and ruined it, how stupid, and b. wow, SIN is a really truly terrible pun for "out."
• I love this woman. We should all be this confident. (i.e. confident enough to wear pasties that clash with our evening gloves).
• Wanton nymphos are the best kind of nymphos. Them prim nymphos ain't no fun at all.

Best things about this back cover:

• Ah, the Insane Phrase Bookend blurb. I should create a tag for these things. They are a truly great part of American literary history. I assure you Hemingway could never have come up with "SIN GUESTS"; not in his whole, adulturous life.
• P.S. "orgiastically"

Page 123~

"I want you to lay me right here and now," she said softly and he fell on her, his malehood jutting and pulsating, as he inched it within her eager body.

You'd think you'd be laughing too hard to properly masturbate to this stuff.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 946: The Book of Paradox / Louise Cooper (Dell 3343)

Paperback 946: Dell 3343 (1st ptg, 1975)

Title: The Book of Paradox
Author: Louise Cooper
Cover artist: Frank Frazetta

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $8-12

[Latest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• The Oracle foretold the coming of the one they call ... Glutemaster!
• Man vs. Angel in the World Pose-Off of Love
• No one did Subterranean Mystical Catacomb Beefcake like Frazetta.

Best things about this back cover:

• "and now" is the biggest LOL line on this whole cover
• LORD OF THE RINGS (... which is absolutely *nothing* like) LORD OF THE FLIES ... and now! ... LORD OF THE DANCE! Nope, sorry, misspoke. It's BOOK OF PARADOX! Feel the fantasy!
• That's an astonishing array of words considering none of it means anything.

Page 123~

Varka shrugged. "Make of it what you will—but I am going to Limbo."

I believe this is the fantasy paperback equivalent of "Screw you guys, I'm going home."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]