Paperback 867: The Dutch Shoe Mystery / Ellery Queen (Pocket Books 2202)

Paperback 867: Pocket Books 2202 (11th ptg, 1958)

Title: The Dutch Shoe Mystery
Author: Ellery Queen
Cover artist: Jerry Allison

Estimated value: $10-15

Best things about this cover:

• This cover says a lot of things, but one of the things it does *not* say is "Dutch Shoe."
• "But she could be number! NUMBER!"
• Pretty sure that's not a regulation police hold—at least not with gun drawn. Does look cool, though.

Best things about this back cover:

• Ooh, signed by quote-unquote Ellery Queen. How elegant.
• "The patient was rich Abigail Doorn, whose money ran the hospital." Yeah, see, you would never introduce anyone "rich so-and-so," and also "whose money ran the hospital" kind of covers that.
• Also maybe don't put "more than life-size portrait of a heroic doctor" next to a super-tiny portrait of a doctor.

Page 123~

Djuna leaped out of his kitchen at the shrill br-r-ring of the telephone bell. "For you, Dad Queen."

I really, really want to believe that a Dad Queen is some kind of sex thing. Something men named "Djuna" would be in to. Please don't shatter my illusions, thanks.

~RP

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Paperback 616: Cop / Jack Karney (Pocket Books 898)

Paperback 616: Pocket Books 898 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: Cop
Author: Jack Karney
Cover artist: Stanley Zuckerberg

Yours for: $10


Best things about this cover:

• I love this cover so much it hurts. Where to begin? 
• The framing! They're apart, but together, but apart, but ... and such a contrast in tone. Male/female. Calm/kinetic. White/pink. Dressed/undressed. Professional/domestic. On and on. And on. And their expressions! Revealing but enigmatic. Is he here to arrest her? Sleep with her? Both? And how does she feel about that? Excited? Headachey? Feels like there's a thousand pages of subtext in this one shot.
• The pink! Such a bold color choice, and the last color you'd expect to have "COP" written over the top of it. 
• The title! Bold, simple, and apparently, by its slight angle, printed on the surface of the door ...
• The detail! The careful positioning of his hand, the texture of the metal fixtures on the door, the stockings, the cigarette. A thousand points of awesome.
• Total lack of blurb / cover copy. Exactly the right choice for this cover. I'll supply my own overheated blurb, thanks.

Best things about this back cover:

• "Get wise!" I love how this book talks. Stop making me love you so much, "Cop"!
• OMG, the back cover is talking not to me, but to Joe! And I'm just eavesdropping, I guess.
• The problem of Joe's "conscience" says a lot about that front cover—shake her down? Take her to bed? Walk away? Does it matter? 

Page 123~

For the next five minutes the cab driver told Joe what he thought of cops in general, citing cases to prove his point that the hackie and the policeman were natural enemies. When he finished, he said, 

"I can smell a cop a mile off. Fact, I just look at a guy and can tell how he makes a buck. You look like a lawyer."

Swing and a miss, hackie!

~RP

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Paperback 548: Superstud / Alan Marshall (Nightstand Books 1847)

Paperback 548: Nightstand Books 1847 (PBO, 1967)

Title: Superstud
Author: Alan Marshall
Cover artist: Someone who can't believe his idea got past house censors

Yours for: $25

Best things about this cover:

• Wow. Just try out-sideboobing this cover. You Can't Do It.
• "Yes, that's my right tit, complete with nipple. No, you're not dreaming. Pretty good, right?"
• The boob is to distract from the hair, which looks great from the brow down, but get up any higher and it's a nightmare of random scalp attachment (and non-attachment). There's a reason they wrote "SUPER-STUD" over the top of that mess.
• Maybe if the hair is red, you might try a different color for the font next time. This book looks like it's titled "R-"

Best things about this back cover:

• Reading the first two sentences makes me think Brett isn't that studly from the neck up.
• Call me old-fashioned, but I like my superstuds to be nailing quivering, creamy-fleshed ladies, not killing cops. What a massive waste of studliness.
• Also, "Brett?" As a superstud name? Vetoed. 

Page 123~

He reached down and pulled her up. He didn't want to finish this way, not this time. He had better things in mind for the bitch with the fantastic boobs. 

Now *that's* a superhero name. Give that bitch a cape!

~RP

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