Showing posts with label Sex Info. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sex Info. Show all posts

Monday, October 26, 2015

Paperback 912: Coming of Age in Samoa / Margaret Mead (Mentor M44)

Paperback 912: Mentor M44 (1st ptg, 1949)

Title: Coming of Age in Samoa
Author: Margaret Mead
Cover artist: jonas

Estimated value: $10-15

MentorM44
Best things about this cover:
  • Striking design. Love the stylized monochrome foliage against the stark white backdrop.
  • They seem like they're having fun.
  • This probably shouldn't remind me of John Travolta and Uma Thurman dancing in "Pulp Fiction," but it does.
  • The most important difference between Samoan society and our own is No Nipples ... For Anyone!

MentorM44bc
Best things about this back cover:
  • I enjoy mentally changing "earnestly" (in Dorsey's review) to "salaciously," "lustily," "hornily," and the like.
  • Freud!?
  • "The domain of erotics." I want to go to there.
  • I read "primitive heart-stirrings" as "primitive heart-strings," because it's nicer.

Page 123~

People forgave her violence and her quarrelsomeness for sheer mirth over her propitiatory antics.

She got away with shit 'cause she was fun to be around and sometimes bought the drinks. (You're welcome)

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Paperback 818: Freud: His Dream and Sex Theories / Joseph Jastrow (Perma Books M4134)

Paperback 818: Perma Books 4134 (1st ptg, 1959)

Title: Freud: His Dream and Sex Theories
Author: Joseph Jastrow
Cover design: Charles Skaggs

Yours for: $7

Perma4134

Best things about this cover:

  • I know. It's terrible, right? It's easily the worst, i.e. the most boring, cover in my entire collection. I think. It's up there, anyway.
  • I sort of like the background pattern, in a wallpaper or possibly denim pants kind of way.
  • "The Stuff of Dreams" made me laugh. Yes, sex dreams can lead to "stuff." For sure. Especially if you are a young man.


Perma4134bc

Best things about this back cover:

  • I see your boring, Front Cover, and I raise you five borings.
  • Even "an appreciation" is boring. We get it, you're legit psych, not phony porn-psych. Ease up on the Big For Legitimacy.
  • Scholars are "dispassionate." Only the best pulp novels are "frank."


Page 123~

It is safe to predict that neither in education, nor in the family or social relations shall we return to a pre-Freudian era.

This is, by far, the most exciting sentence on this page. WHO BOUGHT THIS? Men trying desperately to kill their 4+-hour boners?!

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Paperback 664: Sex Without Marriage / Jonathan Starr and Bonnie Golightly (Lancer 72-648)

Paperback 664: Lancer Books 72-648 (PBO, 1962)

Title: Sex Without Marriage
Authors: Jonathan Starr & Bonnie Golightly
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $20

Lancer72648

Best things about this cover:
  • This design is cool in an abstract art kind of way. Still can't help but wish I could see more of Jon and Bonnie than just their hastily sketched heads, though.
  • I keep reading "the real estate of non-marital relationships," which would be cool—a picture book of cool '60s apartments where people could just go at it.
  • "Bonnie Golightly" is the most made-up of made-up names. "Breakfast at Tiffany's" came out ... in 1961.
  • If I were a single woman I would have a t-shirt made that read simply "Bachelor Girl." I might have one made anyway.
  • Bonnie Golightly is my kind of woman—"unusually frank"!

Lancer72648bc

Best things about this back cover:
  • That first line is brought to you by Dr. Seuss.
  • A. Yes, B. No (a guy's gotta sleep)
  • "Candidly" shmandidly! I want more "frank"!
Page 123~
This female, this hard sister, usually persuades herself that she has some good sensible reason for her self-perversion: to get some capital to go into business for herself, to put baby brother, or her own baby,  through college, to save herself from Mama's miserable fate of poverty and a sadistic husband, etc. She prides herself on being brutally frank with herself, on being shrewd, on being strong enough to be hard.  Quick money and big money is worth the sacrifice.
Oh dear god yes ... "brutally frank" ... that's the stuff. Also, this whole book is written in this florid, nutty style. Opening to random pages yields unexpected delights. Here, let's see ... p. 63: "If you have been spending most of your time at the lady's flat then an occasional bottle of hooch would be in order. You've probably been consuming most of hers." I think I'm going to tweet this whole book over the course of the summer. It's absolutely loaded with Frank Dating Advice For Cool Moderns. Also, thinking of adding "Hard Sister" t-shirt to my custom t-shirt order.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Monday, June 17, 2013

Paperback 663: Women / Ed. A. M. Krich (Dell First Edition D3)

Paperback 663: Dell First Edition D3 (PBO, 1953)

Title: Women
Editor: A. M. Krich
Cover artist: Walter Brooks

Yours for: $7

DellFED3

Best things about this cover:
  • Women—can't live with 'em, can't tear their arms off.
  • Women—how to tell a real one from a sculpture.
  • Women—baffling us with their arcane "experiences" since the times of the ancient Greeks
  • I'm familiar with the green "women" symbol, but I'm having trouble with the mysterious pink thing they've thrown around her neck. Is that a diaphragm?

DellFED3bc

Best things about this back cover:
  • "Prepuberty in Women" seems self-contradictory.
  • "The Unmarried" sounds like a horror film.
  • "Menopause: It's Scary So Here's A Comforting Euphemism."

Page 123~

Among the Arapesh, the problem is seen not as maintenance of potency but as resistance of seduction by strong positively sexed women. "She will hold your cheeks, you will hold her breasts, your skin will tremble, you will sleep together, she will steal part of your body fluid, later she will give it to the sorcerer and you will die."

Sorry, I'm still giggling at "She will hold your cheeks..."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Paperback 529: After Sex With the Single Girl / Richard Bernstein and William Storm Hale (APS 9505))

Paperback 529: APS Books 9505 (PBO, 1965)

Title: After Sex With the Single Girl
Authors: Richard Bernstein & William Storm Hale
Cover artist: N/A

Yours for: $6


APS9505.AfterSex
Best things about this cover:

  • A short-lived experiment in quilting the book title
  • Originally called "Cigarette With the Single Girl," but that title was deemed to have totally missed the authors' (alarmist) point.
  • I like how William "Storm!" Hale kept his pro wrestling name for this gig.


APS9505bc.AfterSex
Best things about this back cover:

  • "Honey, I have something to tell your nose..."
  • "Sex-prone teens!" So sex is like allergies or acne. Good to know.
  • There's nothing dynamite likes less than having light shed on it.

Page 123~ (actually 122—close enough)
John Doe would like to commit adultery, but who wants him? One fat, balding man put it candidly: "What chick would want to go to bed with me unless I paid her?" Such honesty is rare, but he was right; from a self-assured young man, he had been transformed into a jelly-fish slob.
"Such honesty is rare ... but I'm going to pile on his fat ass anyway."

This book is *heavily* underlined and occasionally annotated. My favorite annotation is at the beginning. It's just a list:

page 75—Racial marriages
         77—Gang bang
         131—Normal

It's like some kind of (horrible) poem

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Monday, May 7, 2012

Paperback 525: Sex Games That People Play / Daniel Gordon (ed.) (Ace 75963)

Paperback 525: Ace 75963 (2nd ptg, 1973)

Title: Sex Games That People Play
Editor: Daniel Gordon
Cover artist: photo

Yours for: $7

Ace75963.SexGames
Best things about this cover:

  • So ... what game is this? Naked Opiate Tag? Pretend Overdose?
  • The font alone is skeezing me out. I think this font is called "Unclean Hot Tub."
  • "Edited by..." makes no sense. There are no author credits inside. Maybe he edited ... himself? Is that one of his "games?"



Ace75963bc.Games
Best things about this back cover:
  • There once was a publication called "Sex Guide Magazine" ... seriously, that's the whole story.
  • I love how the book decides, rather late in the game, to go all scare-quotey with "games." "Wait, you mean all this time I thought we were having sex we were really having 'sex'? What kind of 'game' are you playing!?"


Page 123~

Sexually, he was not as passionate, but she did not mind because he always satisfied her. She told a friend, "he always manages to come through with a good one when I need him. Can I ask for any more?"

"Manages to come through with a good one" is about as unerotic as sex talk can get. Anyone who talks about her husband's sexual performance the way she'd talk about her son's little league performance deserves no love, or sex, or human companionship whatsoever.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

PS I think reader JamiSings sent me this a long time ago ... so thanks to her.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Paperback 463: Mr. Madam: Confessions of a Male Madam / Kenneth Marlowe (Paperback Library 55-857)

Paperback 463: Paperback Library 55-857 (1st ptg, 1965)

Title: Mr. Madam: Confessions of a Male Madam
Author: Kenneth Marlowe
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $9
paplib55857.mr.madam

Best things about this cover:
  • Oh good, an Adult Autobiography. I always hate it when children try to write autobiography. Grow up first, you self-involved whiners!
  • How can a book with this subject matter and this title have a cover this terrible. I mean, consider some other covers (which I just found, while trolling the internet):



[Hairdresser of the stars!? Why is this info not on my paperback!?]
  • Kenneth Marlowe was also a female impersonator. More pics:

And now the back cover:

paplib55857bc.mrmad

Best things about this back cover:
  • Ugh. A chalkboard drawing? Is this supposed to be a "twilight man?"
  • Not even the word "frank" to appease me. I hate this book (cover). [I just opened the book and the very first phrase on the very first page is "Uncompromisingly frank," so I feel a little better]

Page 123~

"You all try to help 'Frenchy' get dates, girls. Oh, be sure to remember to call him 'Frenchy.' If you get a date with a John, tell him that for five bucks extra you can have Frenchy sent in. Tell the trick, 'Let Frenchy come in and work on me. It makes me go wild!' That'll work the John up. Or, for $10 he'll work both you and the John. Well, I don't have to tell most of you how to manage it. Use your imaginations. Frenchy will, of course, be working all the exhibitions."

To its credit, this book does get pretty dang 'frank' (esp. by 1965 standards). Why it's not called "FRENCHY!"—with accompanying super-campy picture—I just don't understand.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Paperback 460: American Sexual Behavior and the Kinsey Report (Bantam 227)

Paperback 460: Bantam 227 (1st ptg, 1948)

Title: American Sexual Behavior and the Kinsey Report
Authors: Morris L. Ernst and David Loth
Cover artist: N/a

Yours for: $11



bant227.kinsey
Best things about this cover:
  • Just consider this a sucky cover interlude—if I'm gonna put up all my books, then I'm gonna put up all my books.




bant227.kinsey_0001
Best things about this back cover:
  • The authors have done a service to the "lay public." That sounds about right.
  • Now that I see the cover of the original hardbound edition, I realize I own this book in both editions. Weird.

Page 123~

The Kinsey Report may save a good many homes

For instance, if you get enough of them together, you can fashion a levee.

~RP 

P.S. please enjoy this forgotten bookmark, which I just pulled from the book while looking for p. 123


Bant227.insert


The back of this clipping is actually much more entertaining:


Bant227.insert.rev
Highlights: McCarthy vs. the "Slot Machine King"! Hitler maps! "Jilted Lover Slays Blonde!" and, of course, advice from AUNT HET: "Men shouldn't go visitin' too often. They say about what they said the last time, but it sounds fresh if you haven't heard it for six months." 

Friday, August 19, 2011

Paperback 450: Bride and Groom / F.M. Rossiter, M.D. (Banner Book [unnumbered])

Paperback 450: Banner Book [no #] (1st ptg, 1961)

Title: Bride and Groom
Author: F.M. Rossiter, M.D.
Cover artist: "Lieberman" (?) (see signature, lower right)

Yours for: $20

BannerNn.BrideGroom

Best things about this cover:
  • Somebody did not do very well in Life Drawing class.
  • Are they lying on an uncovered mauve mattress, or simply standing in front of their mauve-mattress-colored wall?
  • OK, what was the deal with women's hair in the '60s? I mean, paperback cover after paperback cover, it's (often) a total nightmare of over-exertion and ghastliness. There was some really lovely looking hair in this era, I know it. Why can't it find its way onto more covers? I'm starting to pity these women, as if they were real people. Though with this woman, when I look at her husband, I begin to think her hair is the least of her problems. I think you're supposed to think he's gazing lovingly at her, but all I see is the dead-eyed look of a junkie who sees a plate of fresh-baked cookies across the room.

I don't know how to convey to you the richness, the pure mad density, of this book. I could spend days commenting on this book. Days. The Table of Contents alone (that's right, the Table of &*%^ing Contents) is a treasure trove of hilarity all on its own. I mean, "perfuming the vulva"!? No joke: "perfuming the vulva." I'll take "Rejected Lifetime Movie Titles" for $1000, Alex. The whole book (The Whole Book) is written as dialog between imagined (god I hope they're imagined) "Wife" and "Husband" and their "Doctor." I think it would all make a very excellent 8-hr. stage play.

Did I mention there are illustrations? There are illustrations. They might need their own, separate write-up. But here's a taste (so to speak):

NippleProfiles

[from the chapter entitled "Making Shadow Puppets With Your Nipples"]


DrunkBoobs

[What your boobs look like to a really drunk guy]

Oh, the back cover. Almost forgot—

BannerNnbc.BrideGro

Best things about this back cover:


  • "This new edition has been revised and illustrated [...] to further enhance its value as an educational document." I think we can all agree: Mission Accomplished.
  • I really wish this book were advertised as "frank" because, frankly, it's the frankest (albeit insanest and misguidedest) sex information book I own.
I made a video of me reading aloud from the chapter called "Sex Facts for Married Couples," but YouTube only loads gibberish (Facebook has no problem with it), so too bad for you. Instead, rather than p. 123, I'm merely going to quote to you from the Table of Contents—specifically, the subheadings for the chapter entitled "The After-Play":
Need for such after-play; disturbing factors; what the husband should do and what he shouldn't do; little personal tricks; husband must exert himself when wife has to; assisting with douch [sic]; washing each other's organs [1]; good night kiss; a wife's "thank you" [2]; post-coital laughter [3]; indication of complete satisfaction
[1] I really hope he's talking about musical instruments here, because ... no.
[2] I assume it's followed by "sir, may I have another?"
[3] "Ha ha ha ha ha ha .... remember when we washed each other's organs ... oh, good times. Thank you. Good night."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

P.S. I got the video to work. Apologies for vid. quality in first 10 seconds or so ... and for the fact that the whole thing is mirror-imaged ... and for saying (in video) that book is from 1963. It's 1961. OK. Here you go:


Monday, August 8, 2011

Paperback 446: Take a Lesbian to Lunch / Ann Aldrich (McFadden Books 125-118)

Paperback 446: McFadden Books 125-118 (PBO, 1972)

Title: Take a Lesbian to Lunch
Author: Ann Aldrich
Cover artist: uncredited

Yours for: $300

LesbianLunch

Best things about this cover:
  • I've written briefly about this book before. Searching for that post led me to this thread, which quotes my original discussion of the book, and features a reply from The Author Herself. I learned about this just this second. I Heart The Internets. Discussion was about the term "lipstick lesbian," which suggested might have been "coined" by this book; that's probably not true, but the author suggests she might have been the first to use the phrase in print.
  • It's not a very vivid cover, sadly, but I love the weird title and the Lipstick on the (Lesbians'?) cigarettes.
  • Oh, this book is super-rare, in case the suggested dollar value didn't tip you off. There's one on amazon for $200 something. I priced mine off the ABE Books listings. The book is no longer available from ABE Books. Insider's look at gay New York in the aftermath of Stonewall by an excellent writer = cultural gold.

LesbianLunchBC

Best things about this back cover:
  • Did people used to think lesbians were mythical? Like sylphs or unicorns or yeti?

Page 123~

"Surely it is the nature and quality of a relationship that matters; one must not judge it by its outward appearance, but by its inner worth. Homosexual affection can be as selfless as heterosexual affection, and therefore we cannot see that it is some way morally worse..." [—from "Toward a Quaker View of Sex," an essay signed by 11 British Quakers, first published in London in 1963]

Not all of this book is so earnest, I assure you. The more anecdotal parts of the book are often entertaining, touching, vivid, and sometimes very funny.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Paperback 444: Sex Without Guilt / Albert Ellis, Ph.D. (Hillman Books 106)

Paperback 444: Hillman Books 106 (1st ptg (?), 1959)

Title: Sex Without Guilt
Author: Albert Ellis, Ph.D.
Cover artist: photo

Yours for: $9

SexWOGuilt.Kinsey

Best things about this cover:
  • I don't know ... she looks pretty guilty.
  • I'm not sure Kinsey was going for "Daring"—he was a scientist, not a soft-porn novelist
  • So Dr. Ellis is just mining his patients' sexual problems for our titillation? This is a great example of how Kinsey provided publishers with a new avenue into the sale of sex—"don't worry: it's science! The boner you're experiencing in reading about it is totally normal."

SexWOGuiltbc.Kinsey

Best things about this back cover:
  • "Frankness!"
  • Oooh, she shows a little more back back here.
  • "Case histories" = Penthouse letters
  • Something about the phrase "preparing youngsters for sexual happiness" doesn't quite sound right.
  • "Sex Fascism!" You mean my need to be dominated by a woman dressed as Mussolini is normal!? Freedom!

Page 123~
Two months after she first came for therapy, she was not only having intense climaxes most of the time she had intercourse, but was also having three or four terrific climaxes a night—while her husband, quite amazed, could not keep up with her, and had to resort to extracoital methods of satisfying her on most occasions.

I'm all for "extracoital methods," though I highly suggest you never ever call them that, especially in the heat of the moment. "OK, honey, which extracoital method would you like to use tonight? ... honey? ... honey, where are you going?"

~RP

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Paperback 443: The Sixth Man / Jess Stearn (MacFadden Books 60-106)

Paperback 443: MacFadden Books 60-106 (1st ptg, 1962)

Title: The Sixth Man
Author: Jess Stearn
Cover artist: N/A

Yours for: $10

SixthMan.Kinsey

Best things about this cover:
  • I know the cover wants to be ominous, with the suggestion that "you can't tell them apart" and "they're hiding among you," but the image just looks too much like the spinning wheel on a game show for me to be too "frightened": "Congratulations, you landed on Fabulous!" (love that the one-in-six is hot pink)
  • Monotonous corporate drones ... or sophisticated men dancing in a Busby Berkeley / Ethel Merman movie? I can't decide.
  • So *this* is what the NBA's "Sixth Man" award is all about ...

SixthManbc.Kinsey

Best things about this back cover:
  • "That's right, we gays have taken over, and we've hung Straighty up by his ankles. Let that be a warning to you. You better queer it up right now, see, or it's curtains for you!"
  • I'm guessing this cover is a lot more scarifying than the actual book.
  • The first two sentences here (particularly the second one) are pointless. "He is a chronicler of events..." Congratulations. I myself am an "eater of Doritos."

Page 123~

George looked like anything but the popular conception of a homosexual. He cut a manly figure, tall, strongly built, and was neatly but plainly dressed. And while he drank and talked fast, gesticulating a lot, so do hundreds of people I know on Madison Avenue who aren't queer.

Interesting, but you might want to rethink your certainty about those Madison Avenue people.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Paperback 427: Adultery in Suburbia / Robert Brooks (Midwood 32-866)

Paperback 427: Midwood 32-866 (PBO, 1967)

Title: Adultery in Suburbia
Author: Robert Brooks
Graphic design: Azzato

Yours for: $17

Mid32-866

Best things about this cover:
  • This title is crying out, begging for a pictorial cover. Maybe I'm supposed to be seeing some kind of funky intercourse in that bathroom-door symbol shenanigans, but I'm not. NOT, I say.
  • I want to be a part of this The Affluent Society. It sounds ... affluent. And sexy.
  • Kinsey! Sadly, the word "frank" appears nowhere on this book's front or back covers :(

Mid32-866bc.Suburbia

Best things about this back cover:
  • Ah, I see we have the requisite "probing deep" claim ... nice.
  • Robert Brooks is ruthlessly honest, I tell you. Ruthlessly! You will say "No, don't tell me about the key parties!" and he will shout "Mwahahaha, you can't stop me! Key parties! Hot tubs! Oh the things I will be honest with you about!"
  • I love the logic of this back cover: "You will ask yourself 'Can this be true?' and you will have to say Yes because, after all, someone went to the trouble of printing it on paper, which, as we all know, makes things true."
  • "You, the intelligent reader..." Oh, you silver-tongued book. Do go on.

Page 123~ [aargh, book is only 122 pages long!; default to p. 23!]

The Monotony of Suburban Living Acts to Make Both Male and Female Restive

That's the title of Chapter 2. Good thing I live in the city itself, and not one of them fancy *suburbs* of Binghamton. I'd hate to be restive.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Friday, June 17, 2011

Paperback 426: Sex and the Armed Services / L.T. Woodward, M.D. (Monarch MB507)

Paperback 426: Monarch MB507 (PBO, 1963)

Title: Sex and the Armed Services
Author: L.T. Woodward, M.D. [pseud. of Robert Silverberg]
Cover artist: Uncredited [Robert Maguire]

Yours for: $12

SexArmedSvcs

Best things about this cover:
  • Navy women sleep with sophisticated diplomats, where Army men sleep with French whores.
  • I have to say that I am disappointed with the balance here between "Sex" and "the Armed Services." You mean I have to *imagine* the sex? Total ripoff.
  • This will sound weird, but the more I look at our two protagonists, the more I like them. They have a distinctly cool look that makes me want to know more about them. I want them to be rivals, scheming for ... something. They would have chemistry, but they would not be a couple. They might have to team up, perhaps using the French whore to pull a scam on the sophisticated diplomat. I'm not sure where the sex comes in, exactly.
  • I LOVE these fake sciencey books that the sex publishers put out in the '60s (complete with caduceus / "Human Behavior" logo, Ha ha: "4 out of 5 scienticians agree, our books contain plausible human behavior"). Part of the whole post-Kinsey "Your Right To Know" "studies" of "real" sex lives, allowing adults to unembarrassingly indulge their penchants for voyeurism. I'm pretty sure the sex anecdotes contained therein are entirely fictional.

SexArmedBC

Best things about this back cover:
  • "Code Red, Code Red, Emergency ... I'm gonna have to go lesbian!" Once you go lesbian, you never go back. Or you do, whatever.
  • What the hell does "mingle promiscuously" look like? Is that when you grope boobs at a cocktail party? "Can I freshen your drink? How 'bout stick my tongue down your throat? No? OK..."
  • LOVE the last sentence, which posits that the military encourages "abnormal" behavior.

Page 123~

The old nurses handled me impersonally, like I was something made of wood, but the very young ones would blush and glance away when their attentions aroused me.

Heh heh. "Wood."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Friday, June 10, 2011

Paperback 423: Bondage Clubs U.S.A. / Robert Newton (Wee Hours 549)

Paperback 423: Wee Hours 549 (PBO, 1967)

Title: Bondage Clubs U.S.A.
Author: Robert Newton
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $20

WeeH549.Bondage

Best things about this cover:
  • I'm not worried about the ropes and chains. I'm worried about the werewolf that's holding them. That is one hirsute forearm.
  • "Social Behavior Series For Adults" — "It's a textbook, honey. I'm just doing my, uh, sociology homework. See, 'documented' ... 'insight' ... it's educational!"
  • Tyrannical yoga instructor: "I told you what would happen next time you gave me a sloppy Pigeon Pose!"
  • Love the Wee Hours logo for how sad it is. The "W" is readily apparent, but the "H" has been tortured almost beyond recognition to form the sides of what I'm guessing is an hourglass ... measuring the Wee Hours of ... the days of our lives ... or something.

WeeH549bc.Bondage

Best things about this back cover:
  • "Blow-by-blow," HA ha.
  • "Thereby," HA ha. "Heretofore, wherein, the party of the first part ties up the party of the second part ..."
  • I know this Italian restaurant where they make an amazing vegan algolagnia.
  • "Penetrating," come on!
  • "Boldly illustrated!?" OK, I'm gonna have to open this baby up ... OK, I don't know what definition of "illustrated" they are using here, but there are precisely *no* illustrations in this book. There are, however, four of the Dullest Bargraphs You Will Ever See. Example:

WeeH549.interior


Page 123~

This guy describes being raped by other guys, and I can't really do anything funny with that ... so ... p. 132!
When I climbed out of the shower, he was right there! He started rubbing me down with a towel, picked me up and carried me into the bedroom, put me on the bed and seduced me. He had a very big penis and was proud of it. He even showed me with a measure that it was eight inches long.

Yes, that *does* sound seductive ... If the sight and feel of it doesn't turn her on, measure it for her! Foolproof!

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Paperback 422: A Cartoon Guide to the Kinsey Report / ed. Charles Preston (Avon 559)

Paperback 422: Avon 559 (PBO, 1954)

Title: A Cartoon Guide to the Kinsey Report
Editor: Charles Preston
Cover artist: "cem" (??)

Yours for: $7

Avon559.CartoonKins

Best things about this cover:
  • "Facts of Life: After Dark"
  • Ladies, if you want to frame your ample bosom in a truly classy manner, Maltese fur is the only way to go.
  • Why are those girls so happy-looking? Do they think the good Dr. is going to be good at pleasing them because he ... knows ... stuff? Or are they just looking forward to talking dirty?

Avon559bc.kinsrep

Best things about this back cover:
  • "Aaaaah! Oh, jesus, you scared me, lady. Maybe back up and comb your hair and put your mouth hole back near the center of your face."
  • Why do they have poor Mr. Preston down there in that tiny cramped rectangle. He looks like a peeping tom at Barbie's Dream House.

Page 123~

Avon559.interior

Since the titles are too small to read, I'll tell you that the first book he pulls of the shelf if "Tom Sawyer," the second is "Treasure Island," and the third is "Kinsey." I actually like this cartoon a lot. Little kids have priorities.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Paperback 416: Sex For One / Harvey T. Leathem with Hugh Jones (Century Books 036)

Paperback 416: Century Books 036 (PBO, 1967)

Title: Sex For One
Author: Harvey T. Leathem with Hugh Jones
Cover artist: —

Yours for: $10

Century036.Sex41

Best things about this cover:
  • "Frank"!
  • Yes, if you are going to masturbate, by all means, do it behind a curtain of silence. I'm trying to work over here!
  • Puzzled by the little logo in the "O" (nice!). Is the real title "Sex For One Pouty-Lipped Woman"?

Century036bc.Sex41

Best things about this back cover:
  • Oh, I'm sorry, *Dr.* Harvey T. Leathem.
  • "... during his years of practice" is the best adverbial phrase ever. "I've been jacking off for years, and let me tell you..."
  • Does he also discuss his hyphen fetish?
  • I love the ALL-CAPS ORANGE QUOTE FROM NO ONE
  • I'm sorry, what's Hugh Jones's role in all this again?

Page 123~
"You see, I had the cycle situated next to an old couch. As soon as the orgasm grabbed me, I'd fall off my bike onto the couch (1). Oh, incidentally—I'd have put a wild record on the phonograph that was kept down there, something with a big rock-'n'-roll beat. This not only further stimulated me, but it drowned out some of the wild laughing (2) that I enjoyed doing, during the moments that the climax had me in its vise" (3).
  1. Oh, that old trick.
  2. "Honey, what's going on in the basement? Is there supposed to be wild laughing in 'Daydream Believer'?"
  3. Wow, her orgasm is a harsh mistress. Grabbing her ... putting her in a vise ... but she's laughing, so I guess it's cool.
~RP

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Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Paperback 414: The Sex Habits of American Women / Fritz Wittels, M.D. (Eton 102)

Paperback 414: Eton 102 (2nd ptg?, 1951)

Title: The Sex Habits of American Women
Author: Fritz Wittels, M.D.
Cover artist: N.A.

Yours for: $7

Eton102.SexHabits
[Cloudy parts are just peeling Perma-Gloss...]

Best things about this cover:
  • Ugh. Way to make sex habits look austere, old, and dusty, Eton Books. This looks like the basement office door in some long-forgotten Institute of Bygone Studies.
  • Well, if any name screams "authority on female sexuality," it's Fritz Wittels ("ahem, Dr. Fritz Wittels") (which really should be the name of some anti-hero in an underground sex comic of the early 70s; in fact, I'm pretty sure R. Crumb drew a Fritz Wittels at some point in his career: "Vood yoo like to taste my Vittles?" he'd ask...)
  • I was going to mock like crazy the title given to Albert C. Rosenthal ("Planning Director of Graphics Institute"), especially after opening the book to a random page and finding this less-than-inspiring graphic offering:

Eton102.Graph1

Terrible stuff, if only because that graphic is totally racist ... but then, I came across an undeniable graphic gem—the kind that gives you remarkable insight into the human condition with just one glance:

Eton102.Graph2

Such realism! I mean, first off, that's the onesie *I* wear to bed. Second, what better way to illustrate the three classic post-coital moods: zonked out, playing air piano with one hand while staring at the ceiling, or curled up like Demi Moore when she freaks out near the end of "St. Elmo's Fire." Dig deeper inside, and you find more graphic classics (or "grassics," as I now like to call them). There's the "happy orgasm slide vs. my fat slob of a boyfriend came and then fell out of bed" graphic:

Eton102.Graph3


... as well as the "I learned about sex from an older lesbian" graphic:

Eton102.Graph4
[Hell yeah, Chart XXX!]

And many more! Now the back cover:

Eton102bc.SexHabits

Best things about this back cover:

  • I can barely read it through the damned hazy permagloss. *$%& it!

Page 123~

Lesbians are not as obnoxious as a couple of men in love with each other.

In 1951, I believe this attitude was known as "progressive."

~RP

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