Paperback 1070: Laughsville, U.S.A. / [No one willing to take credit] (Scholastic T 648)

Paperback 1070: Scholastic T 648 (2nd ptg, 1966)

Title: Laughsville, U.S.A.

Author: Uncredited

Cover artist: George Wilde 

Illustrated by: George Wilde

Condition: 6/10

Value: $6

Best things about this cover:

• So much to recoil at here, but tooth asymmetry is haunting me more than I would've expected. That's an odd number of teeth, with one central Tooth. It's very disconcerting.
• "Can you make it look like he has sort of stubby penis growing out of his forehead?" "I ... can, but ..." "And sort of pube-y little tufts of hair, but only above his ears?" "I don't under-..." "Also his eyes should be beady soulless little things." "[Sigh]. And his ears?" "Filthy."
• "Gulps" and "Gags" really giving this book a vibe I'm not sure it's aiming for. Also, wtf is a "gulps" in this context?
• Also, wtf is "pomes" in this context? It's like I'm being asked to imagine a balding middle-aged guy happily choking on small fruit. Truly weird.

Best things about this back cover:

• OMG the faces are somehow more horrific, how, How?
• Dude's face has been forcefully cleaved in two by the Laughsville sign and he's still smiling. Truly demonic.
• I do love a cover that tells you precisely, mathematically, how funny it is. If you're on a low-yuk diet, this book is for you!

Page 123~

I was packing for camp and one pr.

Of my socks disappeared 'neath the chr.

So I then from my bro.

Had to borrow ano.

Or my toes and my feet would be br.

 Well, I'm making sounds alright, but I'm not sure I'd call them "guffaws."

~RP

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Paperback 945: GI Jokes / Compiled by Lou Nielsen (Dell 77)

Paperback 945: Dell 77 (PBO, 1945)

Title: G.I. Jokes
Compiled by: Lou Nielsen
Cover art: [William Strohmer]

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $10-15

Best things about this cover:

• A catalogue of acceptable and unacceptable [Laugh syllables] in crossword puzzles. HEH! HAHA! HOHO! All fine, but once you get into the HAWs, things get dicey, and HEEEE! ... well, that's right out. And now all I want to do is put it in a puzzle grid...
• This dude seems So Happy to be a G.I.
• The cover design here is really nice. Clean and bright, with fantastic font action, and an explosion of brown chalk marks that looks simultaneously explosive and floral ... or like a barrel just fell apart and this dude's smiling mug was what was inside.

Best things about this back cover:

• Everything. Just ... all of it. I am in love with all of it.
• Speaking of crosswords: WAC.
• Love the surreal mass of female humanity in the background, contrasted with the strong, luminescent isolation of our discriminating main character and her frustrated antagonist.

Page 123~



~RP

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Paperback 729: Something's Got to Give / Marion Hargrove (Popular Library 222)

Paperback 729: Popular Library 222 (1st ptg, 1950)

Title: Something's Got To Give
Author: Marion Hargrove
Cover artist: familiar but Uncredited [Earle Bergey]

Yours for: $9


Best things about this cover:

• Boobs. FUN. Boobs are FUN. I get it now.
• Damn, that's pretty sexy for radio.
• A Lady Lay Abed Too Long … and so she conceived twins? With captain Pipey McChinless there?
• Those Children-of-the-Corn twins will haunt your dreams.
• Question smoke! Nice.
• She is flipping you off.

Best things about this back cover:

• OK, that opening line is Great: "It happened in bed…"
• More Popular Library Nothingness. Ugh.
• Audiences *love* "babies screaming in neglect." Don't you miss the days when paternal incompetence was charming?

Page 123~

"He couldn't have been too hungry," I pointed out, "if he left one of the peas on his plate."

Enjoy your future eating disorder, kid.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 45: Pocket Books 447

Paperback 45: Pocket Books 447 (1st ptg, 1947)

Title: Turnabout
Author: Thorne Smith
Cover artist: Uncredited (possibly Charles L. McCann)

Yours for: SOLD! (8/22/08)

Best things about this cover:

• I can't believe that in the 1940's you could get away with a front cover featuring a transvestite man in the bed of a transsexual Joan Crawford impersonator. Progressive.
• I hope (for his sake) that those are his knees that are tenting that bed sheet.
• Look at the bloody talons peeking out from the sleeve of Man-Joan's candy-cane pyjamas. Run away, transvestite man, run away!
• I believe that Charles L. McCann illustrated this cover. Why? Well, this "woman" has McCann's signature noseless-alien design. Remember this looker, from one of McCann's illustrations in Let's Make Mary?

Of course you do.

I love that the front cover gives you No explanation of what exactly is going on with Joan and her John - you have to flip the book over to find out; not that things get much clearer ...

Best things about this back cover:

• "Ribald" - 40's code for "sexed-up"
• "It seems..."
• "Mr. Ram..." - because Egyptian gods like European formality
• "Tim now occupied his wife's body..." [!?]
• "personally" [???]
• Last sentence makes No grammatical sense - I believe "become" should be "becomes"; I know that Pocket Books had decent editors, so this is just embarrassing
• "... the most hilarious novel in many a moonshine" [which copy writers were clearly drinking when they wrote this up]

Thorne Smith was a terrifically popular "humor" writer of the 40's and 50's. I own several of his paperbacks. One features a lady with preposterous boobs not unlike Mr. Crawford's here, and she is riding a sheep. I know, you can't wait, but you'll have to.

RP

Paperback 24: Hillman 1

Paperback 24: Hillman 1 (1st ptg, 1948)

Title: Let's Make Mary
Author: Jack Hanley
Cover Artist: N/A
"Interpretative Illustrations by...": Charles L. McCann

Yours for: $15


"Let's Make Sex As Dull As Possible!"

You wanted it, you got it: Let's Make Mary! This book is so mind-blowing, so implausible, that I'm going to have to go beyond the cover to the book's interior illustrations! I fear there is no way to convey the hilariously bizarre and surreal vibe of this book, but I will try...

Best things about this cover:

• "Being a Gentleman's Guide..." - What kind of 18th-century syntax is that?
• "Scientific" - The Kinsey Report had a Massive influence on public discourse about sex, starting in the late 40s, and this book's packaging is definitely a result of that influence. Basically, Kinsey gave scientific legitimacy to public discussions of sex, and paperback publishers exploited Kinsey's success by dressing up their silly sex books (especially novels) as public service / educational publications. This book knows that it's ridiculous (it's clearly intended as humor). Others (which we'll see later) don't seem as aware that their claims of scientific legitimacy are far-fetched and absurd.
• Love the TV screen design. I would watch a TV show with that title, especially if it were some Cinemax After Hours remake of "The Mary Tyler Moore Show."

Best things about this back cover:

I can't even touch this. Nothing I say could out-funny the book itself. Instead, I'll just compile a "Best Words and Phrases on This Back Cover":

1. layman
2. chortle
3. Jim Dandy Special mustache (that's a band name if I ever heard one)
4. Fuddle-Duddle
5. M'Little
6. consort
7. primal urges

And now, a special peek at a few of the "Interpretative Illustrations":


Why in the World wasn't this image on the cover!? Grrrrr...

"Oog" I buy, but "Ssskck?" Worst Cavewoman Name Ever.

Oog is the most disturbingly drawn male figure I've seen in a while. I'm just glad I can't see his face.
"Disturbing" doesn't even begin to describe this. I find myself wondering how the drink got spilled. Then I find myself not wanting to know.
"What's Wrong," you ask? Well let's start with the fact that your lady friend has No Nipples. Then there's the fact that she is a noseless space alien. Then there's your @#$#-ing top hat, you jackass. Your facial expression isn't helping matters either. Is that enough?

RP

PS sincere thanks to Bill Kristol and the folks at powerlineblog.com for plugging my site yesterday. Never thought my first major link would come from a political blog, but I'll take support wherever I can find it.