Donations to the Collection: Lust Lodge

Title: Lust Lodge (Nightstand Books NB1621, 1962)
Author: Don Holliday
Cover artist: that guy who did so many of their covers ... whatsisname!

Happy Halloween! You're welcome.

• The Hand!! "Nice to meet you Mrs. ... I ... uh ..."
• X marks the spot, dang!
• Did they even plan to draw a guy into this shot originally? His sliver of head and Random Hand look like total (awesome) afterthoughts.
• I like her underwears. I choose to ignore the fact that she has Ronald McDonald hair.

• Yet another classic from the Absurd Two-Word Intro .../... Outro school of back cover writing.
• To say this is bad writing is really to give bad writing a worse name than it already has.
• Three "wantons" (counting front and back)! Plural, adjectival, possessive. That's gotta be a record.

Page 123~ (brace yourselves ...)

"Don't be melodramatic," she said, blowing smoke once more. It hung in a grey cloud above her, as though prognosticating a storm at the cloud. How symbolic I've become, Beverly thought, looking at the cloud.

As though doing a what at the where now?

~RP

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Donations to the Collection: Ringside Sex (PEC N122)

Several times since I started writing about vintage paperbacks, people have offered to send me books. Not just scans of covers, but actual books. For free. Just ... because. And the cover-loving world rejoices. Allow me to share my latest acquisitions with you. Actually, I'll give you one today, and one this weekend. These books come to me courtesy of a generous reader, Gabrielle Bucci. Hey, the former mayor of Binghamton is named Bucci. Any relation? No. Oh well.

Title: Ringside Sex (PBO, 1966)

Author: Ray Wilde

Cover artist: Hasty McCreeperson

• "You put your right boob in, you keep your left boob out ..."
• This title is pretty blunt. "Are you the RINGSIDE SEX I ordered ...?"
• Something about her position is phenomenally unsexy. Boxer man, however, is one hunky slab of man meat. My favorite part of this cover = his shoes.

• This is from the "Lull Them Into a False Sense of Calm With Ellipses and then SHOUT AT THEM WITH ALL CAPS" School of cover copy writing
• "Lady Fight Promoter" = Prince's never-released follow-up to "Lady Cab Driver"

Page 123~

I sat for about a half hour, sunk in thought, trying to untangle my thoughts and emotions [though mostly trying to think of another word for "thought"]. There was little Gay, back in Los Angeles ... and I suddenly realized that Gay didn't have a chance.

That's too bad, because I'm pretty sure Gay would love a chance at Captain ManMeat there.

~RP

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57 Books from the University Book Sale: Book 3

Title: The Green Wound Contract (PBO, 1963)

Author: Philip Atlee

Cover artist: Well it hardly matters...

Yours for: best offer

• "Black magic! White Slavery! And blue diamonds!"
• "Green Wound" has to be about the grossest phrase you can put in your title
• "Formerly The Green Wound" — whoa, bold title change!

• I do love the many faces of Joe Gall
• Probably the only place you'll find the phrase "a pornographic book in Trinidad"
• "... the Streets of Laredo ..." — hey, I know that song
• Rock me Uncle Tom Asmodeus!

Page 123~

Sitting up, I touched the knot on my forehead gingerly and winced; it was a beauty. I had never known a nun could swing a blackjack that hard.

~RP

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57 books from the University Book Sale: Book 2

Title: Episode of the Wandering Knife
Author: Mary Roberts Rinehart
Cover artist: Rafael de Soto

Yours for: best offer

• Cover copy as internal monologue! Never seen that before.
• So you're hiding the knife in the fishpool ... you know water is transparent, right?
• Jane continued to wage her secret, one-woman battle against kitschy statuary...

• Should I feel bad / worried that I can't interpret this map? "His Breakfast" (!?!?) is out back on the lawn? In some pink Phantom Zone? And "The Secret" is ... maybe under the hedge? In the downspout of the gutters? Meanwhile, "The Knife" wanders lazily up the road ...
• "Experience the thrills and chills and the infamous horrors that await you at ... Larry's House!?"

Page 123~

"Maud," said young Townsend succinctly, "is a cheap Chicago tart. He had no business bringing her here."

Mmmm, cheap Chicago tart ...

~RP

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57 books from the University Book Sale: Book 1

Title: The Confession + Sight Unseen
Author: Mary Roberts Rinehart
Cover artist: Victor Kalin

Yours for: best offer

"Mrrowr"
"Hello?"
"Meow?"
"Uh, I'm calling about the antique phone you advertised in the paper?"
"[purrrr]"
"Is this Rinehart?"

[My wife thought this was a book about a cat named "Rinehart," by a woman named Mary Roberts — a reasonable inference, I say]

Page 123~ (from "Sight Unseen")

Of Elinor Wells I have only my wife's verdict, and I have found that, as is the way with many good women, her judgments of her own sex are rather merciless.

~RP

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Paperback 303: The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter / Carson McCullers (Bantam F1762)

Paperback 303: Bantam F1762 (1st thus, 1958)

Title: The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter
Author: Carson McCullers
Cover artist: uncredited

Yours for: $10


Best things about this cover:

• I'm going to go with "the font." I don't really like this cover.
• Why does this cover make me think the story takes place in China. I fell like this should be the cover of a Pearl S. Buck novel.
• Orange rules, as a color.
• That red drawing of a carnival is so incredibly tiny that I can hardly believe anyone OK'd its inclusion on the cover. What's it supposed to signify? It's too small to create much visual interest, and it bears no clear (or unclear) relation to the main painting. Just weird.

Best things about this back cover:

• "I am Carson McCullers and I am looking at you. Yes I am."
• "... an enduring masterpiece that will live on" — yeah, that's what "enduring" things tend to do. Ugh.
• What is "savage tenderness?" Is that when a native boy gently pats your brow? Or ... what? Was the design of this book (incl. decisions about cover copy) just given over to some intern? The whole thing feels ... not laughably bad, but just off.

Page 123~

Grandpa scratched his ear with a matchstick. 'Somebody got to stay home.'

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

P.S. Tomorrow begins the University Book Sale. I will be there when it starts and will not leave until I have acquired much goodness. I may have to bring helper monkeys to make sure nothing sweet gets by me. Look for the fruits of my labor beginning Sunday.

Paperback 302: Behold This Woman / David Goodis (Bantam 407)

Paperback 302: Bantam 407 (1st ptg, 1948)

Title: Behold This Woman
Author: David Goodis
Cover artist: William Shoyer

Yours for: $40


Best things about this cover:

• Only four?
• Behold these boobs!
• Love the guy's hand: "... must ... not ... fondle ..."
• Notice how often woman is front and center on pb covers while man is off to side, lopped off, seen from behind, kind of in shadows, etc. Woman is meant to be a very particular dish, while man is usu. a kind of Everyman. Or Anysap, I guess.
• Now that I look more closely at the picture, I think that the guy is an interior decorator who is having a coronary after witnessing the pink rococo orgasm that is this room.

Best things about this back cover:

• I'm going to go with ... the knife jammed into the window sill. Yes, that's the best thing.
• Actually, I'm loving the little blue and pink Yes / Buts.
• Wow, the original cover girl for "Behold This Woman" was all kinds of ugly.

Page 123~

The gray-haired man was annoyed. "What do you mean, help you?" he said. "What do you take me for, an ignoramus?"

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]