Title: Adultery in Suburbia
Author: Robert Brooks
Graphic design: Azzato
Yours for: $17
Best things about this cover:
- This title is crying out, begging for a pictorial cover. Maybe I'm supposed to be seeing some kind of funky intercourse in that bathroom-door symbol shenanigans, but I'm not. NOT, I say.
- I want to be a part of this The Affluent Society. It sounds ... affluent. And sexy.
- Kinsey! Sadly, the word "frank" appears nowhere on this book's front or back covers :(
Best things about this back cover:
- Ah, I see we have the requisite "probing deep" claim ... nice.
- Robert Brooks is ruthlessly honest, I tell you. Ruthlessly! You will say "No, don't tell me about the key parties!" and he will shout "Mwahahaha, you can't stop me! Key parties! Hot tubs! Oh the things I will be honest with you about!"
- I love the logic of this back cover: "You will ask yourself 'Can this be true?' and you will have to say Yes because, after all, someone went to the trouble of printing it on paper, which, as we all know, makes things true."
- "You, the intelligent reader..." Oh, you silver-tongued book. Do go on.
Page 123~ [aargh, book is only 122 pages long!; default to p. 23!]
The Monotony of Suburban Living Acts to Make Both Male and Female Restive
That's the title of Chapter 2. Good thing I live in the city itself, and not one of them fancy *suburbs* of Binghamton. I'd hate to be restive.
~RP
[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]
3 comments:
I think "ruthlessly honest" has to be at least roughly equivalent to "frank."
Also, I've seen things in "Hustler" that were subtler than that drawing on the cover.
Rex, I suspect the copywriter might've actually been a 'wee' bit dyslexic.
Clearly the reason these people had so many parties wasn't because they were "restive" but because they were FESTIVE.
And you say you want to be part of "this Affluent Society", but howd'you feel now on learning it was really an Effluent Society?
Speaking of which, here's what I see when I look at the cover: a flat chested, Twiggy cropped drug blitzed 60s' hippy chick, (willowy unshaved legs splayed wide, heels held athletically aloft in the air), taking a Boston Steamer* on the waxed chest of a middle aged balding transexual, each of whose individual 'testicles' 're larger than 'his' gender reassigned vaginal 'penis'.
*a steam emitting dump, usually, but not always, taken on a glass table placed over the recipient to maximise their view of events
p.s.
So, y'see, it's true what they say - beauty really IS in the eye of the beholder!
p.p.s.
Back cover: "Reading this book there will be times when you will be forced to ask yourself if people really do the things reported in this book".
Translation: "You'll say to yourself, 'How come all these people're having all this fun under every roof except mine, yet I'm reduced to reading about it with my my hand wrapped round my pecker!'"
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