Title: Tutor From Lesbos
Author: A.P. Williams
Cover artist: Uncredited
Yours for: $55
Best thing about this cover:
- OK, Lesson One: how to sit in a chair.
- In order of awesome: sunglasses, butterfly chair, wig, sweater set.
- I'm imagining the frugal parents who are excited about this ad. "'No charge'! What a deal!"
Best things about this back cover:
- The question we've all been asking all our lives.
- "Love" quote unquote hahaha. Oh, Ginny, Ginny, who can I turn to ...?
- "Consider the emotions of..." Well, that's a new angle.
- "Feel the despair of..." Ditto.
- So the dad *watches*? Gross/hot.
- LOL uncontrollably at the last four sentences on this back cover.
Page 123~
[Hamilton] [...] worked at his desk until lunchtime, when he walked into several downtown shops and finally purchased an ugly gray fedora and a pair of sunglasses. These would render him inconspicuous, he figured, and enable him to blend in with the other drinkers at the lesbian bar. He had heard that dark glasses were worn as a badge by the city's questionable element.
Finally I understand why lesbians are constantly hitting on me every time I put on a fedora and sunglasses. Thank you, "Tutor From Lesbos"—aptly, you have taught me so much. Also, I would join a gang / club / sleaze appreciation society called "The Questionable Element."
~RP
[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]
2 comments:
He's gonna need more than a hat and sunglasses to blend in with the clientele of a lesbian bar.
Dammit, Rex! Now I'm going to be stuck with that song all day.
That chair, though. What an artifact of its time.
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