Title: Sin Crop
Author: J. A. Nash
Cover artist: the artist of the damned
Yours for: $19
Best things about this cover:
- Define "best"
- This artist graduated from the "Making Nudity Sad and Joyless" school of painting
- The positioning of the "Adults Only" sign, dear god! ... "Wanda lived her life by one rule - no anal sex with minors."
- "... and then the starfish just attacked my boob. It was so weird ..."
- The background color is there to remind you of the dirtiness you should be feeling in your soul right about now.
Best things about this back cover:
- For every Sin Crop, there must be a Shame Harvest
- Remember what I said about back cover copy on sleaze paperbacks (see Paperback 230: Lust Cult). Well, this is pretty typical of what I was talking about. I mean ... comma splice! Come on!
- "A gaggle of rural women" - I doubt that phrase has ever been used by anyone, anywhere, ever (besides this cover)
Page 123~
As I slowly let my lips glide down to hers, let them collapse to softness, melting and caressing, consuming hers.
Apparently, I am supposed to believe that that is a complete sentence. Then there's this:
Her lips were hot, indescribably soft and moist, forming a delicate cushion [!]. Still I held the locked contact [?], slowly moving my mouth, my arms holding her gently but firmly ...
I lost it at the "slowly moving my mouth" part. Made me imagine being gummed to death by ... what was the name of those novelty singing large-mouth bass?
~RP
7 comments:
"Big Mouth Billy Bass."
I don't know if I'm disappointed or relieved that this is the only post that has been tagged "starfish".
It had to be done. I had to google "a gaggle of rural women". I got you and this: http://www.smh.com.au/news/tv-reviews/not-all-tea-and-scones/2007/02/26/1172338541524.html
Hmmm.....
* This redhead reminds me of Marion the librarian from the "Music Man". Her head looks middle aged, but her body looks much younger. Rex is right, definitely joyless.
* That is VERY weird breast covering indeed ... Starfish would be difficult to find on the average farm. Perhaps it's a waffle cone with powdered sugar; a tortilla shell; or, even Christmas cookie dough! AS it says,"They ... would use any and all methods to keep their prize gigolo from leaving...". Maybe he or she had a real sweet tooth?
* The cool thing about censorship placards is that they encourage the imagination. For example, I choose to envision something protruding from her derriere ... something handy around the farm ... like: a "What's up doc?" end of a carrot; a goat's foreleg and hoof; or , maybe even a chicken's beak!--- See, the possibilities are endless! Remember, "They were baser than their animals ..." and "...they would tolerate no interfering with their SHAME HARVEST."
I adore the term shame harvest. "So, I planted my sins...hope we'll have a real good shame harvest."
Joyless indeed, look at what I call "porno feet".
Like, where they've beein traipsing around the set barefoot all day and their soles are ghastly-dirty.
Dismal that the artist rendered it so exactly. Skeevy!
That's just a sun-shaped pasty. Not unlike the nipple jewelry Janet Jackson sported.
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