Paperback 322: The Syndic / Cyril M. Kornbluth (Bantam 1317)

Paperback 322: Bantam 1317 (1st ptg, 1955)

Title: The Syndic
Author: Cyril M. Kornbluth
Cover artist: uncredited (I want it to be Richard Powers, but who knows?)

Yours for: $13


Best things about this cover:

• "Are we not men? We are DEVO!"
• In the background, generic scifi cover ... but in the foreground: Dirk Studly models his Kanye3000 spex and his real boss new flashlight holder.
• I love this guy. The cover dies without him. "I'm here to rescue your cover, ma'am. Don't worry."
• "Syndic?" The "-ate" was just too much of a mouthful? I am pronouncing this title "The Sin Dick," and hope you do the same.

Best things about this back cover:

• More outrageous exclamation point action. Love it! Start with a timid "Tomorrow?" and end with a big fucking exclamation point slamming down on your cover: "Hell yes, tomorrow!"
• Oooh, the "twenty-first century" ... I'm going to look out my window now and there better be little people running frantically through sand pits, away from a dystopic city and toward their badass, flashlight-wielding savior, or I'm going to feel very ripped off.

Page 123~

"I'm Ken Oliver, a figure man in the Blue Department, Picasso Oils and Etchings Corporation. Dr. Latham sent me here for—what do you call it?—a biopsy."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Paperback 321: Wicked Women / ed. Lee Wright (Pocket 1263)

Paperback 321: Pocket 1263 (PBO, 1960)

Title: A Butcher's Dozen of Wicked Women
Editor: Lee Wright
Cover artist: Morgan Kane

Yours for: SOLD!


Best things about this cover:

• If they'd just get rid of the text and let me see what she's looking at, this cover would be perfect.
• Great Girl Art, Girl With Gun, Gams Galore, all overlooking a cityscape. I live for covers like this. Subtle, sexy, delicious. Her arm position, her hip cock ... perfect. If I woke up in a hotel room and *this* is what I saw when I looked over at the balcony, I could die a happy man.
• Problem: the painting gives off an urban, hard-boiled vibe. Those authors ... do not. I mean, they're fine, if you like more traditional mysteries, but the ones I recognize are somewhat cozier than authors I tend to read. There *is* a Kenneth Millar (aka Ross Macdonald) story inside. Not sure why he's not on the cover, as he is pretty well established at the time of this book's release.

Best things about this back cover:

• Cool '60s design — vaguely rectangular swatches of different bright colors arranged in asymmetrical relationship to one another — continued from front cover.
• I'm torn between the practical Lucy and the vengeful Daihili.

Page 123~

from "Suspicion," by Dorothy L. Sayers

He sipped it thoughtfully, standing by the kitchen stove. After the first sip, he put the cup down. Was it his fancy, or was there something queer about the taste? He sipped it again, rolling it upon his tongue. It seemed to him to have a faint tang, metallic and unpleasant. In a sudden dread he ran out to the scullery and spat the mouthful into the sink.

I read one novel by Sayers and the mystery (or rather, its solution) was So preposterous that I never read another. I will say, however, that the woman knows her way around a sentence. She translated Dante, after all.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Paperback 320: Gunpoint! / John L. Shelley (Graphic 124)

Paperback 320: Graphic 124 (PBO, 1956)

Title: Gunpoint!
Author: John L. Shelley
Cover artist: Saul Levine

Yours for: $11


Best things about this cover:

• I love how excited the title is just to be alive! Exclamation point! And I *love* how the exclamation point is *so* excited that it's falling over.
• I also love how the shooter is making that great, wincey, western, "I'll get ye, ye rascally varmint" face.
• His partner has fallen in perhaps the most awkward position I've ever seen a dead body in on a paperback cover.
• Check out the interior title page — very cool:

And the back cover:


Best things about this back cover:

• "Let Sleeping Lawdogs Lie" is phenomenally lame. Is "lawdog" even a word?
• "Lived to kill ... killed to live ... wrong end of a rope ... right end of a gun" — somebody's been practicing his bad movie trailer patter.

Page 123~

Broady came to him, an ancient Sharps buffalo gun in the crook of his arm. His broad face split in a dusty grin and he patted the stock of the weapon.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Paperback 319: Seven Days Before Dying / Helen Nielsen (Dell 971)

Paperback 319: Dell 971 (1st ptg, 1958)

Title: Seven Days Before Dying
Author: Helen Nielsen
Cover artist: R. Del Rossi

Yours for: $12


Best things about this cover:

• The amazing detail on the shoes and socks. I would have thought this one of the more boring crime fiction covers, but I looked at the shoes and socks for a while and they're lovingly rendered, and kind of mesmerizing.
• That lady is either chasing a very clumsy thief or drunkenly stumbling through a public park, chucking her jewelry at schoolchildren for amusement.

Best things about this back cover:

• There's some blue splatters on it ... for some reason.
• You know a novel means business when it breaks out the Courier font.

Page 123~

Stu leaned forward and extended his right hand in a greeting that was never acknowledged, whereupon the blonde toppled forward into her drink again. By this time, she was beyond caring anyway, so Stu let her stay there.

Did I mention that Helen Nielsen's a pretty good writer. 'Cause she is.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Paperback 318: A New Kind of Love / Henry Williams (Dell 6329)

Paperback 318: Dell 6329 (PBO, 1963)

Title: A New Kind of Love
Author: Henry Williams
Cover artist: photo cover

Yours for: $9


Best things about this cover:

• This photo does not say "sizzling." It says "awkward last kiss before I plummet to my death."
• If you invert the book, Woodward's position makes sense. That is also the only way Newman's pose makes sense. Which raises the question — why is it upside-down? I'm sure it's a metaphor, but I can't see how making them look like acrobats/monkeys helped move any more books.
• Nice gams.

Best things about this back cover:

• "Samantha soon realized that something was missing. Like, for instance, a man." — sounds like "The Old Kind of Love" to me.
• If she was a career girl, then she was already a "new woman." She's Becoming Eye Candy, which I'm all for, but it's not new.
• Sadly, the photos are not, as advertised, "provocative." Although this one ... has potential. She looks like something out of a gay space-age western:

Page 123~

"Isn't it charming?" Felicienne said. "It's so large, it's gone beyond bad taste and come out on the other side, chic, elegant, bizarre."

You'll be happy to know she's talking about a diamond.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Interlude — 2 books I "borrowed" from the BPOE in St. Maries, ID

Come on, how was I *not* supposed to take these?:


Best things about this cover:

• So ... it's about a vengeful virgin? Why not just call it that?
• I'm not sure I'm convinced that Mr. FancyShirt QuaintPinky could make a door explode like that. Seriously, look at his "grip" on that gun. It's like he's drinking tea or something.

Best things about this back cover:

• "Reifel" — from the Dept. of Unimaginative Naming

Best things about this cover:

• When grilling Nick Carter, make sure his massive barrel chest is well basted.
• "Just a second Nick, I'm almost at the next level of 'Missile Command'..."
• That Nick Carter head/logo is the smuggest, douchebaggiest look achievable by a human face.

Best things about this back cover:

• WHEN was it acceptable to break "assassination" between the first and second Ss???

Page 123~

from "Assassination Brigade":

He fired, and the bullet chipped off a piece of pavement about an inch away from me. By then, I had Wilhelmina in my own hand. The man only had the opportunity to snap off one more shot before I had steadied the barrel of my Luger and put a bullet in his belly.

In case you missed that — he named his Luger "Wilhelmina." God save me from ever finding out what that particular relationship is like.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Paperback 317: The Summer Ghosts / Alexis Lykiard (Tower 43-891)

Paperback 317: Tower 43-891 (1st thus, 1966)

Title: The Summer Ghosts
Author: Alexis Lykiard
Cover artist: photo

Yours for: $11


Best things about this cover:

• That photo does not say "never caring about tomorrow." It says "ennui." Also, "UNCENSORED!" = false advertising. Move your arm!
• That's a wig. That is also Cameron Díaz.
• I thought "hippie" was spelled "-ie," and "hippy" was a word used to describe a somewhat widish woman.

Best things about this back cover:

• "Society" w/ a Capital "S" = HA ha. "We're not gonna conform to your bourgeois ways, man!
• "The What's Happening? Generation" — I think I was part of the sequel generation: "The What's Happening Now? Generation"

Page 123~

... Fantastic battles begun with zip-gropings or oiled smooth friction of hand on nylon leg ... she sheds clothes like petals, hurriedly ... breast straining to its full pink apex ... fleecy triangle ... a cunt like a warm sticky fondue into which I dip my finger my tongue my prick seeking that unique tangy flavour like a madman or a driller for texan oil.

Bored with his many accolades, and distressed that most people knew him only as "that 'Road Less Traveled' guy, Robert Frost turned to ghostwriting softcore late in life, primarily as a way to amuse himself.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]