Title: Passion Panamania
Author: J. X. Williams
Cover artist: Uncredited
Yours for: $28
Best things about this cover:
- When the women's beach volleyball team says "Closed Practice," they mean "Closed Practice."
- I'm a bit worried for that guy. I mean if he were shirtless and she had a whip, that would be one thing, but pantsless, spread-eagle, and she's got a knife? No. All the boobs and butt cheeks in the world aren't going to make this situation erotic.
- What is her right hand doing!? Please don't say "anointing the sacrificial lamb."
- Winner: Frondiest Cover of 1967.
- A Latin Lesbos, eh? So ... and island ... in, let's say, the Caribbean ... Well, there's Jost Van Dyke, but I'm gonna say "too spot-on."
Best things about this back cover:
- Yeah, if you're having marital troubles, just go camping. Works like a charm.
- Um, question? What is "the PASSION PANAMANIA"? Because, grammatically, it seems to be some kind of miasma or disease or sea god.
- "And the swapping and sharing could begin..."—so it's some kind of convention for Beanie Baby collectors? No, wait: "no conventions" ... I'm stumped (which is what the guy on the cover is going to be saying in 3, 2, ...)
Page 123~
They understood each other too well to waste words. Maria said, "We all—all five of us—took part. But only one—not me—did the terrible thing you know about. We others were as surprised and felt as horrible about it as you do—I swear it, _mi amiga_!—but we just stood there as she—Oh, _madre_, it was so awful, the blood..."Dear god, who is jacking off to this!?!?!
~RP
[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]
5 comments:
Ha! Just saw this over at Pulp Covers. Was wondering what is was all about … and while I'm still not sure, I've still learned too much.
Suffers from being overshadowed, but how awesome is that title type treatment?
I know that the quality of the cover art rendering isn't of primary importance to these books, but for the love of god, can't they print the cover with enough subtlety so that it doesn't look as if 'Naked woman with hands on hips" doesn't have the worst case of cellulite in the history of porn?
On the front cover. I didn't know "wantons" was a word?
I like the giant frond conveniently covering his crack. Women can have bare breasts and butts hanging out there, but we must protect male modesty!
They knew each other too well to waste words, but then Maria wasted about, oh, 60 of them.
/Ranks as one of the skeeviest covers evah.
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