Paperback 123: Johnny Havoc and the Doll Who Had "It" / John Jakes (Belmont 90-289)

Paperback 123: Belmont 90-289 (PBO, 1963)

Title: Johnny Havoc and the Girl Who Had "It"
Author: John Jakes
Cover artist: photo cover

Yours for: $9


Best things about this cover:

• If by "It" you mean "pointy left boob" or "bosomy sweater-filling capability," then yes, she has "It."
• I would love it if the "It" in this title was actually just the stupid cigarette
• I Love this dame: "Yeah, I got "It" - what's it to ya?!"
• Great cover copy - parodying this cigarette advertising campaign:

and



Best things about this back cover:

• There are some days when it's Really hard to improve on the paperback's own inherent funniness. Today is one of those days.
• I love the idea of having your P.I.'s shtick be ... that he's short.
• INA Young has a name built for crosswords (among other things, I'm sure)
• "Wednesday Wilde" is a great play on Sex Kitten Tuesday Weld (who was in my favorite movie that no one saw - "Serial" - as well as on the cover of one of my favorite albums of the 90s - Matthew Sweet's "Girlfriend")

Page 123~

"Hey, Moe, you all right?" I touched his shoulder.
One fat tear trickled down his cheek. "I shoulda been a pawnbroker, Claudio."
My God, don't start bawling."
"It's Finishville. For all of us."

~RP

Paperback 122: The Professor and the Co-Ed / Babette Hall (Belmont 90-280)

Paperback 122: Belmont 90-280 (1st ptg, 1963)

Title: The Professor and the Co-Ed
Author: Babette Hall
Cover artist: uncredited

Yours for: $9


Best things about this cover:

• This guy must have gotten his Ph.D. in Gigantic Chalkboardery
• "How do you like my perky breasts, professor?" / "I'd like them a whole lot better if you'd actually point them in this direction, you idiot."
• "My hands can do the splits" / "Uh, yes, that's very nice. Get out."
• Seriously, that guy looks way more annoyed than he does excited.
• Sometimes I write autobiographical stuff under the name "Babette Hall" ...

Best things about this back cover:

• I love blurbs that are descriptive rather than qualitative. So thank you ... Marc Connelly, whoever you are.
• I don't think I can do anything to add to the hilarity of Professor Shaw's revealing, sadistic diatribe.
• "Top critics have hailed this novel, and millions of readers agree..." - agree that WHAT!? Hailed it as WHAT? Way to avoid the whole "quality" issue.
• That Ladies' Home Journal blurb ... I've never seen anything like it. It's not related to anything. It's a complete non sequitur designed only to take up space, as far as I can tell.

Page 123~

I'm trying to make sense of Any of the sentences on this page, and I'm failing. I can barely make grammatical sense of them. Let's try this:

On the other hand I suspected there was something false in my philosophy because Phineas Todd wanted more than any of us, and accused the other Goat-singers of being satisfied with crumbs. It was all very confusing. I hoped to find the answer in Hollywood

and this:

But Seattle in my affections wasn't any larger than the pink bauble, not as large actually, being more remote.

~RP

Paperback 121: Bucks County Report / Irwin Wallach (Tower 43-690)

Paperback 121: Tower 43-690 (1st ptg, 1966)
Title: Bucks County Report
Author: Irwin Wallach
Cover artist: uncredited

Yours for: $10


Best things about this cover:

• "Frankly, Scarlett, this mattress is lumpy"
• For such a hot topic (sex in suburbia) this is a terribly tedious cover. If it weren't for the tepid embrace there on the bed, it would look like a government report of some kind. "Bucks County Report: The Roads Have Been Repaved" ["Yay!"]
• The publication of the Kinsey reports on male and female sexuality in the late 40s and early 50s created a public discourse on sexuality that (ironically?) gave license to sex fiction publishers to promote their work with cover copy appealing to people's alleged scientific / civic interest in the subject. Peyton Place + Kinsey Report => books like this one.

Best things about this back cover:

• Awesome dated vocabulary: "jerkwater"! "squaresville"!
• "... then along came Wilson" - I knew that guy was a perv

Page 123~

Bucks County parties were the easiest for Sam because he did not have to participate beyond having his body in attendance and a glass in his hand. But this particular party held a strangeness for him.

~RP

Paperback 120: While Murder Waits / Bruce Cassiday (Graphic 145)

Paperback 120: Graphic 145 (PBO, 1957)

Title: While Murder Waits
Author: Bruce Cassiday
Cover artist: Al Puhn (that's a painting!?!?!)

Yours for: $10


Best things about this cover:

• Alternative titles:
  
• "Saran-Wrapped for Murder!"
• "Shrink-Wrapped for Murder!"
• "Harlot Under Plastic!"
• "I Spent My Prom in the Shower"
• "I'm this many years old!"

Best things about this back cover:

• OMG, yes. Please please please can we call it a slay!?
• It began like a game of what?
• "Cash Madigan!" - awesome name, but how much of a tough guy can he be if he has to struggle to fight his way out of some dame's arms?
• "Some like 'em dying!" - god I love this cover copy writer. That phrase isn't even remotely close to an actual phrase. "What rhymes with 'Hot?' ... I know, how 'bout 'dying'?!"

Page 123~

Marty Roan's eyes were narrowed and bright with thought. "Granted she did not have money, there still might be reason for the badger game."

~RP