Title: Not I, Said the Vixen
Author: Bill S. Ballinger
Cover artist: [Bill Johnson]
Estimated value: $8-12
Donation to the collection from Mr. John Q. Brooklyn (I don't want to use real names w/o permission). Guy asks me "Can I send you a book for your blog?" Twist my arm!
Best things about this cover:
- "Isn't it true that your favorite letter is "I", Miss Lorents? ANSWER THE QUESTION!"
- "Do you deny that you are overwhelmingly sensual? DO YOU!?"
- This is a "vixen"? This looks like someone who showed up to a table reading for her role as "Vixen" in an episode of "Perry Mason." She does have a pretty boss head-tilt, but my prescription for greater vixenitude is less clothes, more gun. And … yeah, sure, go ahead and put on the glasses. OK, now shoot the D.A. and then stand over his body like, "told ya."
Best things about this back cover:
- Way to bury the lede, Gold Medal. How is PROWLED THE WORLD OF TWILIGHT WOMEN not on the cover!?
- She "ruined her lovers with the hot breath of scandal" ("scandal" being a last-minute substitute for "chili cheese fries")
- "Please state your name for the record." "Ivy Lorents." "And how do you spell 'Ivy,' Miss Lorents? I presume it starts 'I', 'V'…" "Not I." "Objection! Permission to treat the vixen as sensual, your honor."
"You had her … falling all over herself," Ivy said, pleased with the memory of Pauline's discomfort.
Please invest that sentence with all the Sapphic innuendo you can muster.
[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]